Dom questioned reality because he had been in limbo, and it plays merry havoc with your sense of perception. We saw what happened to him and Saito; they were almost amnesiac. My theory that on some level the dreamer always knows they're dreaming if it's their dream comes from the fact that Dom did, eventually, realize that he and Mal had to get out. However, he was fooled for a long time, and is understandably more than a little paranoid about it now. Hence the use of two totems.
He tells Ariadne not to build from memory because it's one of the things that helped trip him and Mal up. You might always know on some level that you're dreaming, but if you can convince your rational mind that you're awake, then you're in trouble. It might not be possible to do this long-term outside of Limbo, but Dom is not taking any chances - well, not with other people. His own hypocrisy is lampshaded very well by Arthur in the second level.
I can't see Mal coming up with the totem idea and not talking Dom into choosing one for himself, that just doesn't make much sense to me.
He tells Ariadne not to build from memory because it's one of the things that helped trip him and Mal up. You might always know on some level that you're dreaming, but if you can convince your rational mind that you're awake, then you're in trouble. It might not be possible to do this long-term outside of Limbo, but Dom is not taking any chances - well, not with other people. His own hypocrisy is lampshaded very well by Arthur in the second level.
I can't see Mal coming up with the totem idea and not talking Dom into choosing one for himself, that just doesn't make much sense to me.
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