Your journey back to Birth is haunting you. Your departure from the Earth is haunting you.
RECAP OF KEVIN DURRANCE IN THE PAST MONTHS:
I realize how much I actually dislike people.
Watching "True Life: I'm Under Peer Pressure" with Elyse pre-work it showed 3 kids trying to change their physical, mental or moral selves to be accepted from their peers. After seeing that, I've realized that I've never cared what people really thought about me or how they perceived me. This isn't because I have a high self-esteem, I really just dislike people so much that their opinions don't matter to me. Most people are either liars, let-downs, attention seekers, or pessimistic lumps.
I swear that there's a light in me, I just refuse to shine it on people that are blind with arrogance.
Not saying my light is any better than anyone elses, I just refuse to associate my kindness with pointless pride and faux-intelligence.
In other news I moved back home to the LBG. I guess I'll save an enormous amount of money, other than that I'm not sure about the perks of living in my house again. It's better than living on the street, so I suppose I'm content.
I constantly feel like I'm wasting my time and putting so much effort it to a lot of things but getting no positive results to show for it. I'll just march on and keep going. I refuse to give up so soon.
Everyone's saying that Summer went by too fast, or how much fun they had this Summer. I didn't have a Summer. I worked, went to school, was in the studios working on projects/recording a My Place song that will never touch anyone's ears, playing shows, practicing, working, closing the coffin lid on An October Country, so on and so on. A lot of work but nothing to show after months of money and man hours of effort. My passion of music and expression is rekindling at least.
I didn't see my friends from high school much this Summer, but the few times I did it was... interesting.
I haven't seen most of these people for 1-2 years, but reconnecting and hanging out and drinking and adventure was good. Everyone is growing, moving on, moving up. Some friends have blossoming relationships, longstanding friendships, and some close ties that I never thought would be broken were, well, broken. I'm just assuming that everyone will either leave me or I'll leave them. The only dependable thing about the Future is uncertainty. I believe that. I have stronger ties with some of my friends (as few as they are) than ever before, and with some friends the ties are thin and will most likely snap with time. It happens. I'm not bitter. It is what it is.
I wonder what I'll become in the following years. The biggest question on my mind constantly.
The Future freaks me out more than the Universe does, and the Universe scares the shit out of me.
KABOOM
I'm outta hurr.
I realize how much I actually dislike people.
Watching "True Life: I'm Under Peer Pressure" with Elyse pre-work it showed 3 kids trying to change their physical, mental or moral selves to be accepted from their peers. After seeing that, I've realized that I've never cared what people really thought about me or how they perceived me. This isn't because I have a high self-esteem, I really just dislike people so much that their opinions don't matter to me. Most people are either liars, let-downs, attention seekers, or pessimistic lumps.
I swear that there's a light in me, I just refuse to shine it on people that are blind with arrogance.
Not saying my light is any better than anyone elses, I just refuse to associate my kindness with pointless pride and faux-intelligence.
In other news I moved back home to the LBG. I guess I'll save an enormous amount of money, other than that I'm not sure about the perks of living in my house again. It's better than living on the street, so I suppose I'm content.
I constantly feel like I'm wasting my time and putting so much effort it to a lot of things but getting no positive results to show for it. I'll just march on and keep going. I refuse to give up so soon.
Everyone's saying that Summer went by too fast, or how much fun they had this Summer. I didn't have a Summer. I worked, went to school, was in the studios working on projects/recording a My Place song that will never touch anyone's ears, playing shows, practicing, working, closing the coffin lid on An October Country, so on and so on. A lot of work but nothing to show after months of money and man hours of effort. My passion of music and expression is rekindling at least.
I didn't see my friends from high school much this Summer, but the few times I did it was... interesting.
I haven't seen most of these people for 1-2 years, but reconnecting and hanging out and drinking and adventure was good. Everyone is growing, moving on, moving up. Some friends have blossoming relationships, longstanding friendships, and some close ties that I never thought would be broken were, well, broken. I'm just assuming that everyone will either leave me or I'll leave them. The only dependable thing about the Future is uncertainty. I believe that. I have stronger ties with some of my friends (as few as they are) than ever before, and with some friends the ties are thin and will most likely snap with time. It happens. I'm not bitter. It is what it is.
I wonder what I'll become in the following years. The biggest question on my mind constantly.
The Future freaks me out more than the Universe does, and the Universe scares the shit out of me.
KABOOM
I'm outta hurr.