word salad cause i miss you
It's stream of consciousness time:
So it's decided - after the program ends I'm going to Malaga (in Spain), Lisbon, Paris, Berlin, Krakow, and Budapest. I'm the most excited about Budapest... studying here in Prague has really (started, merely begun) to fill in the GIANT gaps in my education about the east and former communist countries and it makes me hungry for more. I find the people here absolutely lovable and fascinating in their withdrawn, stoic, darkly hilarious, randomly enthusiastic way.
Today we went to Kutna Hora and saw the "bone church" - an ossuary. All the bones have been cleaned and then arranged. There are over 10,000 bones, bone chandeliers, bone stacks, bone garlands for the walls... it was overwhelming. We took the train about an hour outside of Praha to get there. I was in a bit of a foul mood though. I bought myself some Chacos (nice, hiking sandals) before the trip and that's the only shoes I brought so I've been wearing them day in day out for 5 weeks now. I probably walk between 5-10 miles a day here, public transportaiton is awesome but I just love wandering the streets and getting lost. SO anyway, I have developed some truly spectacular callouses on the bottoms of my feet, and this morning one of them split open. It was excruciating... plus the leader of our little entourage decided he wanted to walk all over the known world. When I got home an hour ago, I soaked my feet, then filed the hell out of them, bandaged them, and I feel so much better. Chacos should come with a warning label! It was disgusting but satisfying stripping all the skin off my feet - little pieces were flying everywhere. Ew. So nasty... but so good.
Later I'm probably going to stay in and watch a movie, edit some photos, and relax. I've been working on the Roma school story all week. I actually have to write a paper for my Czech art history class while I'm here. I've selected David Cerny, an installation artist, for my topic... but now I have to find sources in English, which will be a bit of work. I'm trying to avoid the temptation to go to dinner with Tomina, my charming and solemn and delicious Czech man, who invited me out for Thai and a movie, but I know I should stay in and stay off my foot, to give the crack some time to close. I have other cracks in my mind from working so hard that I can feel need rest and closing as well.
So this has turned into stream of consciousness now, which is lovely and I haven't done alot of writing like that lately, even here in my journal, which I know I'm going to regret later. It's just that the time here is so precious to me I want to be out in it, not talking about it. It's so strange to only be able to communicate in broken english, so after a while I just got a lot quieter and now it's strange to be using complete sentences. Things got quieter on the inside too. I do have friends on the trip but they are younger than me, mostly I get together with the film class TA or the program directors or Tomina. But overwhelmingly I am alone, and walking, and shooting. It's been really delicious... there are so many things that used to run through my head back home, and now that I really can't talk to anyone it made me a little crazy, but then it passed... and then the thoughts passed too. I feel like a blue bowl of calm, cloudy water.
I hope that you keep a small precious corner of yourself for the secret things that please you, strange gears, contraptions, shooting photos, or writing, or whatever you like to do that you can't justify to anyone else. I feel like Prague has brought this corner bubbling up out of my mind and reminded me of its existence, and its necessity.
And..... I'm spent. Going to go put my feet up and read David Sedaris.
So it's decided - after the program ends I'm going to Malaga (in Spain), Lisbon, Paris, Berlin, Krakow, and Budapest. I'm the most excited about Budapest... studying here in Prague has really (started, merely begun) to fill in the GIANT gaps in my education about the east and former communist countries and it makes me hungry for more. I find the people here absolutely lovable and fascinating in their withdrawn, stoic, darkly hilarious, randomly enthusiastic way.
Today we went to Kutna Hora and saw the "bone church" - an ossuary. All the bones have been cleaned and then arranged. There are over 10,000 bones, bone chandeliers, bone stacks, bone garlands for the walls... it was overwhelming. We took the train about an hour outside of Praha to get there. I was in a bit of a foul mood though. I bought myself some Chacos (nice, hiking sandals) before the trip and that's the only shoes I brought so I've been wearing them day in day out for 5 weeks now. I probably walk between 5-10 miles a day here, public transportaiton is awesome but I just love wandering the streets and getting lost. SO anyway, I have developed some truly spectacular callouses on the bottoms of my feet, and this morning one of them split open. It was excruciating... plus the leader of our little entourage decided he wanted to walk all over the known world. When I got home an hour ago, I soaked my feet, then filed the hell out of them, bandaged them, and I feel so much better. Chacos should come with a warning label! It was disgusting but satisfying stripping all the skin off my feet - little pieces were flying everywhere. Ew. So nasty... but so good.
Later I'm probably going to stay in and watch a movie, edit some photos, and relax. I've been working on the Roma school story all week. I actually have to write a paper for my Czech art history class while I'm here. I've selected David Cerny, an installation artist, for my topic... but now I have to find sources in English, which will be a bit of work. I'm trying to avoid the temptation to go to dinner with Tomina, my charming and solemn and delicious Czech man, who invited me out for Thai and a movie, but I know I should stay in and stay off my foot, to give the crack some time to close. I have other cracks in my mind from working so hard that I can feel need rest and closing as well.
So this has turned into stream of consciousness now, which is lovely and I haven't done alot of writing like that lately, even here in my journal, which I know I'm going to regret later. It's just that the time here is so precious to me I want to be out in it, not talking about it. It's so strange to only be able to communicate in broken english, so after a while I just got a lot quieter and now it's strange to be using complete sentences. Things got quieter on the inside too. I do have friends on the trip but they are younger than me, mostly I get together with the film class TA or the program directors or Tomina. But overwhelmingly I am alone, and walking, and shooting. It's been really delicious... there are so many things that used to run through my head back home, and now that I really can't talk to anyone it made me a little crazy, but then it passed... and then the thoughts passed too. I feel like a blue bowl of calm, cloudy water.
I hope that you keep a small precious corner of yourself for the secret things that please you, strange gears, contraptions, shooting photos, or writing, or whatever you like to do that you can't justify to anyone else. I feel like Prague has brought this corner bubbling up out of my mind and reminded me of its existence, and its necessity.
And..... I'm spent. Going to go put my feet up and read David Sedaris.