(no subject)
For the last little while I've been surviving on naught but hopes and dreams.
Even my moving back here to Greenville was done in such a manner. I hoped and I dreamed that i would make it back into school, be able to afford my continued survival, etc etc.
And sometimes, hopes and dreams become tangible aspects of life. Thankfully, that is the current case :)
A month from now, I'm going to be a student again. A twenty four year old undergrad...but I'm coping with that fact. Well, in fact. I'm just happy to be given a second chance after I fucked the first one up so royally. And I quite honestly did. I take full blame.
I spent Friday/Saturday with Justin. It was beautiful. Almost a year later and we're still Us. even apart. It's strange sometimes. And heartbreaking. Every time he leaves, i wonder if it's the last goodbye. Either we'll stay as we are until i finish ECU and decide to move to Asheville myself...or eventually even this fragile ...thing, for lack of a better definition, will fade. And really, i don't know which i'd rather have. Put my life on hold but for the few moments we can steal every few months....or let go of the one thing that Even Now feels so right? hopes and dreams, hopes and dreams...
Even my moving back here to Greenville was done in such a manner. I hoped and I dreamed that i would make it back into school, be able to afford my continued survival, etc etc.
And sometimes, hopes and dreams become tangible aspects of life. Thankfully, that is the current case :)
A month from now, I'm going to be a student again. A twenty four year old undergrad...but I'm coping with that fact. Well, in fact. I'm just happy to be given a second chance after I fucked the first one up so royally. And I quite honestly did. I take full blame.
I spent Friday/Saturday with Justin. It was beautiful. Almost a year later and we're still Us. even apart. It's strange sometimes. And heartbreaking. Every time he leaves, i wonder if it's the last goodbye. Either we'll stay as we are until i finish ECU and decide to move to Asheville myself...or eventually even this fragile ...thing, for lack of a better definition, will fade. And really, i don't know which i'd rather have. Put my life on hold but for the few moments we can steal every few months....or let go of the one thing that Even Now feels so right? hopes and dreams, hopes and dreams...