constant motion
it's funny if you look on facebook notes there's a lotta people our age writing similar thought processes down, i guess it makes sense that our generation looks at things in a set way.. constant motion is something a lot of people talk about.
you are always meeting new and drifting from people in your life, it's interesting though how you are almost in complete control of holding on and letting go, overlooking or embracing.
it's like, where do you draw the line between fighting and caring.. vs. letting go and not giving a fuck.
i cared about melissa's situation a great deal more than anyone else in our apartment, until her completely apparent lack of respect and disregard not only for her roommates, but her so-called friends as well. i feel like i try pretty hard to be an understanding and supportive person and friend, but i can be a fucking cold person when i want to be. and i think i'm done with melissa. we all are, we all highly dislike her and want her out, we already plan for david to move in next quarter. all of this happened within a day.. that is how serious the situation is. it stemmed from a simple disagreement and could have been handled if she were not to have been so selfish, and had known how to communicate with her peers. she's never been without the upper hand in any decision making processes in her life, and probably feels completely justified in her selfish desires.
anyways that's very little of what i was thinking, but i can't help but babble about it cause it is so frustrating. the end of three friendships could have been so easily avoided. it's so crazy how you assume people at our age should know by now how to get along with other people. but there's always surprises.
"making a difference" in the world" and "being meaningful" to both yourself and others.. heavy burdens. can be applied in so many ways. i had thought being a meaningful person was to be in the spotlight, on a large scale. it goes back to the different roles you see in a micro environment like spop, there are the loud, all inclusive players, the ringleaders and motivational speakers. then there are the more humble, behind the scenes players who take time to single people out and make their mark on those few. i play the latter role and have always felt like it was so unsubstantial compared to the ray's of the scene, the ones that get heard, the ones people remember.
i know i am making a huge impact on a few people, one of my more annoying spoppers for sure. daniel suk calls me every single day, and tells me daily how awesome i am and that he wuvs me. i first just laughed it off and he said "no seriously, not many people can put up with me, but you still talk to me!" i don't know.. i guess the point is you really can make a difference and find meaning in any situation and at any level in life, it's just up to you to acknowledge the fact that you do mean something and you do make a difference, and just try to not let opportunities to do so slip by. it's so easy to give up and complain about it. it's what i'm used to, and it's how i'm handling the roommate situation, and yeah, i need to think about it more, because even after thinking about it for a substantial amount of time tonight, i still have no desire to have melissa be part of my life anymore. cause i'm not big enough of a person to let her have the honor. but can she help the fact that she can't see outside of herself, since she's never had to before?
you are always meeting new and drifting from people in your life, it's interesting though how you are almost in complete control of holding on and letting go, overlooking or embracing.
it's like, where do you draw the line between fighting and caring.. vs. letting go and not giving a fuck.
i cared about melissa's situation a great deal more than anyone else in our apartment, until her completely apparent lack of respect and disregard not only for her roommates, but her so-called friends as well. i feel like i try pretty hard to be an understanding and supportive person and friend, but i can be a fucking cold person when i want to be. and i think i'm done with melissa. we all are, we all highly dislike her and want her out, we already plan for david to move in next quarter. all of this happened within a day.. that is how serious the situation is. it stemmed from a simple disagreement and could have been handled if she were not to have been so selfish, and had known how to communicate with her peers. she's never been without the upper hand in any decision making processes in her life, and probably feels completely justified in her selfish desires.
anyways that's very little of what i was thinking, but i can't help but babble about it cause it is so frustrating. the end of three friendships could have been so easily avoided. it's so crazy how you assume people at our age should know by now how to get along with other people. but there's always surprises.
"making a difference" in the world" and "being meaningful" to both yourself and others.. heavy burdens. can be applied in so many ways. i had thought being a meaningful person was to be in the spotlight, on a large scale. it goes back to the different roles you see in a micro environment like spop, there are the loud, all inclusive players, the ringleaders and motivational speakers. then there are the more humble, behind the scenes players who take time to single people out and make their mark on those few. i play the latter role and have always felt like it was so unsubstantial compared to the ray's of the scene, the ones that get heard, the ones people remember.
i know i am making a huge impact on a few people, one of my more annoying spoppers for sure. daniel suk calls me every single day, and tells me daily how awesome i am and that he wuvs me. i first just laughed it off and he said "no seriously, not many people can put up with me, but you still talk to me!" i don't know.. i guess the point is you really can make a difference and find meaning in any situation and at any level in life, it's just up to you to acknowledge the fact that you do mean something and you do make a difference, and just try to not let opportunities to do so slip by. it's so easy to give up and complain about it. it's what i'm used to, and it's how i'm handling the roommate situation, and yeah, i need to think about it more, because even after thinking about it for a substantial amount of time tonight, i still have no desire to have melissa be part of my life anymore. cause i'm not big enough of a person to let her have the honor. but can she help the fact that she can't see outside of herself, since she's never had to before?