This is a time for the teddy bear.
Ryan and Lauren have been amazing! Ryan waited in the ER with me for 6 hours while I was dying of back pain. Lauren came as soon as she could to keep him company. Then Lauren made us dinner and they both have been very willing to wait on me when I need it.
I should have seen this injury coming. Everything else is falling apart it was only a matter of time before my body fell sute. Everyone keeps saying "I want to move to Orlando to get away" I want to move somewhere that no one knows who I am in hopes that I will forget who I am. I want to start over and feel good and sure about myself. I want people who I love to stop disapointing me and leaving me feeling cold and alone. Some people have low self esteem. Mine goes deeper than that. I don't believe in anything. I wait for everything to come tumbling down right on top of me, and then find some way to blame the ruin on myself.
Who am I supposed to trust? If I can't trust them I can't trust you. I know no one. People I have lived with and known my whole life are complete strangers to me. How did I miss this? Why wasn't I ready? I should have been prepared for the demise of my family and dreams.
I don't even have expectations anymore because I have not had one filled in over 2 years. I am no longer surprised or impressed with people. I feel so alone in the slightly over weight smoker's body, and my back hurts a lot.
Can on feel like this forever? Is there any hope, or can one only feel high on the pain killers the doc gives you because without them you can't move?
I should have seen this injury coming. Everything else is falling apart it was only a matter of time before my body fell sute. Everyone keeps saying "I want to move to Orlando to get away" I want to move somewhere that no one knows who I am in hopes that I will forget who I am. I want to start over and feel good and sure about myself. I want people who I love to stop disapointing me and leaving me feeling cold and alone. Some people have low self esteem. Mine goes deeper than that. I don't believe in anything. I wait for everything to come tumbling down right on top of me, and then find some way to blame the ruin on myself.
Who am I supposed to trust? If I can't trust them I can't trust you. I know no one. People I have lived with and known my whole life are complete strangers to me. How did I miss this? Why wasn't I ready? I should have been prepared for the demise of my family and dreams.
I don't even have expectations anymore because I have not had one filled in over 2 years. I am no longer surprised or impressed with people. I feel so alone in the slightly over weight smoker's body, and my back hurts a lot.
Can on feel like this forever? Is there any hope, or can one only feel high on the pain killers the doc gives you because without them you can't move?