(no subject)
It seems my updates are never good but can you blame me? I'm fucking depressed & the world around me does nothing but push me down & claim its only because " they want whats best for me ". Well you know what take that bullshit idea of your's & shove it because I can't remember the last time I asked anyone besides my mom for a shoulder or some advice. I spent this morning crying to my mom about how i felt, issues with friends, & how I'm dying to drop out of school. When I say crying, I really mean BAWLING. My mom leaves for work and about 10 minutes later my brother gets here bitching at me because I'm not at school. Last time I checked the only one I needed to report to was my mother, so I told him she already knew. Then he started screaming about how I wasn't going to graduate and blah blah blah. It got really nasty because I told him I hadn't asked for his opinion & he started ranting about how I'm a piece of shit because I'm always crying for my alcoholic boyfriend (Andy) which I haven't even spoken to in like 3 days now. I don't know where he gets his fucking ideas but he's got me fucked up. He does nothing but fuck over my mom & make her suffer yet he's suppose to be a voice of reason for me? HELL NO! I'm soo hurt right now, I'm crying my eyes out. AH! I hate this world & everyone in it.