fucking why me!!!!!!
ran out of ciggerettes about 15 mins ago. put on my shoes, grabbed my keys and when i open the door, this spider dangles down with its legs spread twitching as it jerks down. big tan yellowish one with black marks. so i just close the door immediatly an say "fuck that". but im fiending, and i need a fucking smoke, but face that thing?!
so i grab my trusty 409 bottle, open the door, an the thing is still in my face height, like it was fucking waiting and holding its ground, which actually freaked me out more.
i grip the 409, and set to "spray" on the nozzle, and hosed him down.
the motherfucker wasnt even phased by the 409, he didnt even actually move i dont think, just the force fron the spray moved the web he was on... im fucking scared man, im too scared to leave, and i can never fucking find my lighter when they are around!!!
so fucking help me god, i wanna dedicate my life to irradicating the entire species of arachnids.
i had talked to the landlady previously about the spider problem, she said "they kill the ants". i wanna live in this world everyone else does where because spiders kill ants, you just arent tripping about them anymore. i said to her, "thats great but see i hate spiders, like im seriously afraid of them, and if i had to trade the spiders for the ants, id rather have the ants". an she fucking laughs at me, wtf? im dead serious here, if i fucking had the balls to even deal with these things, id gather all of them up and put them over in the doorway by her office, just call her up and say, "you know my ant problem is gone, so i just gathered em all up an brought em over to your office doorway". she fucking defended the spiders so much i swear i was talking to a giant spider with a wig.
-J
so i grab my trusty 409 bottle, open the door, an the thing is still in my face height, like it was fucking waiting and holding its ground, which actually freaked me out more.
i grip the 409, and set to "spray" on the nozzle, and hosed him down.
the motherfucker wasnt even phased by the 409, he didnt even actually move i dont think, just the force fron the spray moved the web he was on... im fucking scared man, im too scared to leave, and i can never fucking find my lighter when they are around!!!
so fucking help me god, i wanna dedicate my life to irradicating the entire species of arachnids.
i had talked to the landlady previously about the spider problem, she said "they kill the ants". i wanna live in this world everyone else does where because spiders kill ants, you just arent tripping about them anymore. i said to her, "thats great but see i hate spiders, like im seriously afraid of them, and if i had to trade the spiders for the ants, id rather have the ants". an she fucking laughs at me, wtf? im dead serious here, if i fucking had the balls to even deal with these things, id gather all of them up and put them over in the doorway by her office, just call her up and say, "you know my ant problem is gone, so i just gathered em all up an brought em over to your office doorway". she fucking defended the spiders so much i swear i was talking to a giant spider with a wig.
-J