crazy

[imsoevil]

Ok well...Me and Mike had gotten back together before the Kiss and Aerosmith concert...which was back at the start of October..I think. Well anyway we were together awhile then got in a fight on Monday...which then led to me breaking up with him. I truely regret that...although people have said I'm better off without him..I just dont' feel that way. I miss him alot and love him more than anything...At the time it seemed like breaking up would be better for the both of us, but I've come to realize that it's not better for me...although I don't know how he feels about it. I ended up asking him to take me back...I haven't gotten an answer back yet, and I don't know when I will..neither does he. I guess since I can't be with him right now I should just be happy being close friends with him. It really sucks though loving someone and knowing it was your own fuck up that ended it. yes I am seriously bothered by this whole thing....it drives me crazy constantly...and I have to refrain from telling Mike that i love him...because I know he knows and if all we are is friends right now then as a friend I should respect that and to me friends don't exactly tell eachother that they love eachother in the way that I'm meaning it. I've been talking to him alot and not much has changed, but some of the things I used to talk about just doesn't seem to fit into a friend conversation. I had a dream the other day about him...and a girl from his school, but I won't go into detail on that...it pretty much scared the shit out of me....anyway nothin much else has been goin on....Karate is taking over my life which seriously is pissing me off, but hell I've been in it this long....gotta keep up with it...

DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL
-Trista (Tristy)