Death Takes a Holiday
Just a list of things I've been thinking about since the new episode last night that I need to get out of my head before family obligations take me away from internet access for the weekend. You are now officially warned for spoilers:
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I do blame him for not apologizing. He said hurtful things too, and he was the one who brought the damn thing back to their hotel room and restrained Sam, making Sam vulnerable to the siren's spit attack - if Sam needs to be sorry for what he said under the siren's influence, Dean does too. And Sam's apology didn't ring false with me - the one at the end of 4.14 felt like he didn't know where to begin and the one at the beginning of 4.15 felt like he's said it several times and he knows Dean won't believe it this time either. If I were Sam I wouldn't want to confide my secrets - dark secret I'm probably at least in part ashamed of - to someone who isn't acknowledging he's hurt me even when I acknowledge I've hurt him.
Dean has a superiority complex too, and he's had it for a long time - calling Sam selfish, deciding what's best for them (like making the deal even though Sam wouldn't want him to and even though Dean, thanks to John's deal, knows what it's like to go through knowing someone you love is in Hell because of you), dismissing the times Sam disagrees with him as Sam being selfish or under the influence of the dark side, etc. In Scarecrow Dean basically called Sam a bad son, which turned out to be the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back (which is why Sam left in that episode).
I don't mean to make it sound like I think Dean is all bad and Sam is completely blameless - they both have an equal share of the blame. That's why I hope whether they just stick to the emotional distance or add physical distance they both come together and apologize to each other instead of Sam groveling to get his brother back.
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