THERE'S ONLY BEEN YOU(35/35+Epilogue)
TITLE: ’’THERE’S ONLY BEEN YOU’’ (35/35)
Author:
imnotskerrd
Pairing: Adam/Kris; Adam/OMC; Kris/Alexis
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. Completely fabricated.
Summary: Adam
and his family worked as a housekeeper at the Allen's mansion. Kris was a rebellious kid that made Adam's life miserable. But then, they fell in love and Kim, Kris' Mother did everything in her power to break them apart. Kim forced Adam to leave Conway by threatening his family, and so he did. He left, but Kris found him and they lived in LA until Adam had enough of Kim's cruelty and left Kris for good to marry the Music Mogul Seth Carter. But after few years, he learned that he couldn't live his life without Kris. Would he be too late to have Kris back? Would Kris be willing to hurt Alexis despite everything she did and ran back to Adam?
MASTERLIST
It was almost a year.Too many things happened, so many things to do. He had finished his secondalbum and he was busy promoting for his second single. Days were so fast, just like a blink of an eye. Some things had changed, Like he was now in a much larger house, had a couple awards that were sittingin his living room, and he became more popular than he already was. But somethings had definitely remained the same, he was still the same old Adam. Funny and bubbly, who liked to hang out with his friends and family and who always brings his Mother(instead of a date) to any red carpet events. That was kind of sweet actually.
Seth became much of aconfidant and a friend to him. Though sometimes their closeness had generated some issues, they tried not to be affected by it. They were both single anyway, so no biggie. They were being photograph when they were out having lunch or dinner. They were bombarded with assumptions that they were reunited and back together. Neither of them made a comment, they didn’t worth their time. ‘Let them speculate’ Adam said one day, when Seth voiced his mind on the topic. With the course of a year, Adam tried to moved on. And he thought he fairly did good at it. He lived his life like a normal 27 year old would. He did tried to go on a few dates as well, just testing the water, you know. But eventually, he felt he was really not into it and he thought it wasn’t fair to the other guys if he couldn’t even enjoy their company. So, he stopped forcing himself. He would just wait, ‘have faith’ as Allison put it. He knew his right man would come along his way in most unexpected time. He believed it, he felt it, and he prayed for it.
Speaking of Allison, she was now signed in a label, and today was her launching party. Adam couldn’t be more happier and prouder. He loved her like a sister and she really was there when Adam needed her most. Adam stood up in front of his huge mirror, he was already dressed. He was in a black suit with gray shirt. He brushed his hair up that really accentuated his new gray/silver highlights at the tip of his hair. He looked at his reflection, then he focused on his owned eyes. Yeah, some things ought to remained the same. The sadness was still there.
The hurt and pain were long gone, he had moved on from that, or so he thought. He already accepted that they weren’t belong to each other. But he was still sad, sad that he was alone, that he didn’t have anyone to hold on to at night. Someone to looked up in the morning, lying next to him or someone to say ‘good night’ to. He couldn’t say there were no people who tried to catch his attention and wanted to date him, because they were quiet a number of that actually, but like he said, he wasn’t into them. He didn’t want to admit, because damn, that was like digging your own grave. But deep in his heart he knew what he really wanted, who he really wanted. But he didn’t want to think about it. Not really.
As he ran his eyes to the length of his body, checking for something that wasn’t there, because he really was nervous. Attending this party would only meant one thing, he would inevitably bump into Kris. After all this time, he would see him for the first time. He let his mind travelled, he’d never done this for a very long time. Healways tried to block any thoughts about Kris. But now he let himself think about what had happened 7 months ago. He felt like his gut had been punched again and that his breathe was knocked out of him. He could very well remember that day, 7 months ago, when he unexpectedly saw Alexis.
Kris and Alexis both quit their jobs at the Columbia more than a year ago. Adam thought it was uncalled for especially for Alexis. Kris became a full time song writer and he was quiet successful at it, so it was really a better decision to quit the janitorial job. He didn’t heard from them after that. And when the expected date for their wedding came(not that he was invited or something, or there was an actual invitation), Adam just cooped up in his house and watched a Gossip Girls rerun.Nobody mentioned about the wedding, or anything similar to it. Though he noticed Isaac’s stare to be odd, like he was dying to tell him something but couldn’t.
So, he moved on from that, like he always did. He knew he didn’t have a fucking chance at Kris, not in this lifetime anyway.
But then he saw Alexis. She was with her Mother in her desk outside Seth’s office, when one day he went to pay his friend a visit. He actually halt from his walking, like he was suddenly glued to the ground. He wasn’t expecting to see her is all, and that caught him off guard, just a little bit. But then, he returned to his senses, he smiled and walked up to her and hugged her. He felt just... right. He couldn’t explain it, but he thought, he really didn’t have any hatred left in his heart. They chatted for a few minutes while standing at the door, changing pleasantries. Adam wasn’t planning on holding her much long, she might be going somewhere you know. But when he asked her ‘how she was’, her replied
just shocked him. He was like being struck by lightning or something because as he expected her to say ‘I’m okay, I’m happily married to Kris for 6 months now’ not like he was counting, but he just knew, okay. Instead she said ‘I’m okay,
happy as a single lady should be’.
Then he needed to say his goodbye to Seth even before saying hello. He invited her to a restaurant near the building. She agreed and so they went. Adam needed to know what had happened.
‘’I broke it off. I made it for us, you know. I mean, I know he loved me, we’ve been together for over a year. And I can see how he’d tried, how he was so determined about us. But I wanted him to marry me because he was in love with me, not because he was obliged to.’’ She looked up at Adam, then continued, ‘’He would be forever in love with you, Adam.’’
‘’But, he chose you over me. and I already accepted the fact that we will never be together. Maybe, you are wrong, Alexis. Is he... Is he okay?’’ he asked worriedly, because he didn’t know what happened to Kris. he didn’t heard anything about him. But he knew if something were terribly wrong, Alli wouldn’t keep silent. Kris and Alli still communicating with each other, he was sure about that.
‘’Yeah, he is. We called off the wedding, it was a mutual decision. He’s good, don’t worry.’’
After that conversation, he had so many sleepless nights followed. He was so disturbed and hurt at the idea that Kris had broken off his wedding without telling him. He continued to be upset for days until Alli called him for it. She didn’t know that he had a talked with Alexis.
‘’Okay, spill. Why are you so upset, huh? You seem to be not in the mood for few days now.’’ She started as she plopped down beside him at the couch. Adam was still in his pyjama at 3pm. He was eating French silk when Alli came to his apartment. So, she knew he was bothered by something.
‘’Why I’m always the last one to get the news?’’ he said, still staring at the TV. But Alli knew he wasn’t even watching it, because obviously his mind wandered somewhere.
‘’So, you know. How?’’
‘’I ran into Alexis few days ago. She told me.’’ then he shoved a mouthful of the ice cream to his mouth, then another one, and one more. Until Alli got hold with the spoon and took the cartoon of ice cream in his hands, she put it on the table and settled back again on the couch.
‘’Okay, you want to tell me how you feel about it?’’ Adam looked up at her.
‘’Am I even allowed to feel sad and hurt, Alli? I mean, they were supposed to be married 6 months ago. 6 months. Then it didn’t happened and he didn’t even bothered to tell me. He might think that I am too desperate. That If he would tell me, he thought I would jump at him.’’ he hurtfully chuckled.
‘’Adam, we don’t know what Kris is thinking. Why all this time he doesn’t even tried to talk to you. Not even call you. But we all know one thing, he loves you. He always love you. Why don’t you go and pay him a visit? Did you know he still has your old apartment? I’ve never been there for several months though.’’ Adam stared at her with such an unbearable sadness in his eyes. ‘’ Adam, go to him. you can make this right you know.’’
Adam shook his head, ‘’No, Alli. I can’t. I can’t take any more rejection. I couldn’t handle yet another rejection from Kris, I couldn’t survive it this time if he does.’’
They didn’t heard anything from Kris. Even Alli couldn’t reach him. He wasn’t in his apartment and his phone was off. But apparently, before they were all gone to full blown panic, Kris called Alli to tell her he was okay. That he was just away for a vacation. Writing songs. Adam felt relieved upon hearing it, too. Though, a tinge of pain still crept from inside of him learning Kris went away just like that. Well it was really a clear message to him that Kris didn’t want him anymore. And so he thought he made the right decision by not making the first move again. He was so tired
begging for Kris’ love, his heart was so beat up already. Maybe some things were just not meant to be. He needed to just let it go. Let him go.
For almost a year now, he was already in the point that he thought having Kris again was almost impossible. He didn’t even called him even once. He was totally forgotten by Kris. Maybe he was already happy with someone else now. Alli never mentioned him to Adam again, and that was fine with him.
Thinking about Kris, or rather letting himself think about Kris always ended up in tears. But not now, he didn’t have the time to freshen his make-up if he’d destroy it by crying. Actually, even he didn’t cry, he was really, really late for Allison’s
party. He would never hear the end of it, if he wouldn’t move his ass and go to that party already.
When he arrived, the room was already full of people. He saw his Mother and Seth talking and so he walked up to them. His band were also there. They talked for a moment until Allison finally came to the room. People started to applaud and Alli went to say hello to each of her guest. When she came to him, they hug for so long and
when they finally pulled off each other, their eyes were misty.
Alli continued to welcome her guest, while Adam tried to mingle with the crowd. He was talking with some new Artist in the business when he spotted him. The one who still made him jitters all these years. Their eyes met and Adam just stared back at him, after few moments, Kris’ lips formed a small smile and just nodded at him.
Then he turned his attention back to the person whom he had been conversing with.
Adam felt like a bucket of ice had been thrown at him. Just like that? Kris hadn’t care enough for him to even say hi? To know how he was? Even for old time sake, you know. He just acknowledge his presence, then... nothing. Not that he expected for Kris to knelt down on his knees and proposed to him when they finally see each other again. But, what the heck, it was already one year. One fucking year had passed without seeing and saying anything to each other. Didn’t he even worth the few steps to say hi?
Adam suddenly couldn’t breathe. He thought he would collapse if he wouldn’t get out of this room. He politely excused himself from the people around him and slowly walked his way to the door. He found it to be the door to the back garden. There were some people standing at the back patio and sitting at the chairs, but they didn’t even glanced at him when he walked down the stairs. The place was exquisite, so serene, so peaceful. The opposite of what he was feeling at that moment. The night was cold and he found himself standing at the middle of that garden, head
tilt, gazing up to the moon.
It really hurts. He expected it to be, but he never expected it to be this much. He thought he was prepared but in reality nothing has prepared him with the pain of being ignored and rejected. Though he had been rejected by him couple of times, It would always hurt.
But what hurt the most was he seemed didn’t even care anymore about him. That was what really pained him, like he was being stabbed right into his heart. He thought he meant something for Kris, that the 6 years they had been together were enough for him to at least care. But he was wrong, so, so wrong.
He bound to be alone forever, because he knew he wasn’t capable of loving someone like he did for Kris. and he knew he would always compare them to him. So, yeah, he would be forever alone and that scared him. Maybe this is a karma, for all what he had done to Kris before. It was the universe’ way of punishing him. For him to be alone.
‘’Hey’
‘’ohmygod, you scare me.’’ Adam jumped out of his skin by the voice that seemed appear from nowhere. His hands were on his chest, rubbing it. ‘’you’ll give me a heart attack.’’
‘’I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. You just seemed so lost with your own thoughts. Are you okay?’’ Kris asked, he glanced up at him, looking at him intently. Like he was reading his eyes.
‘’Yeah, I’m okay. Why I wouldn’t be okay? I’m perfectly fine.’’ He hoped he sounded so convincing because he himself didn’t believed at what he just said.
‘’Good.’’ He still looked at him, Adam stared back again at the moon, because Kris’ stare started to make him uncomfortable. ‘’ Um, how are you really, Adam?’’ he asked again, as if he knew Adam was anything but okay, and he wanted for Adam to tell him that he really wasn’t. Jerk, Adam thought.
‘’You want to hear the truth? I was doing okay before today. I was really doing great, until I’ve realized that I would surely see you tonight, here. It was a year since I last saw you, I-I don’t know how I would react. I thought I was prepared, but-I wasn’t.’’ Adam was nibbling at his bottom lip after he said that, afraid to looked at Kris. He didn’t want to see his reaction to what he said. God, he scared him away again.
‘’Adam, I-‘’
‘’It’s okay, Kris. I don’t need anyone’s pity. I can get through with this, like I always does. I’ve been through worse.’’ He said cutting whatever Kris was about to say.
‘’It’s not pity, Adam. I just really wanted to know how are you.’’
‘’Well, I just told you.’’
‘’I’ve been wanting to call.’’
‘’But you didn’t, obviously.’’
‘’It was so hard to not to, considering you were the first one came to my mind after we decided to called it off. The wedding I mean.’’
‘’But I guess, it wasn’t that hard. You manage to live for a year without even calling me. you didn’t even care how I was. You just disappear, popped like a bubble.’’
‘’I’m sorry if you feel that way, but you have to believed me that I care for you. I just have to do that. To get away for awhile. To think. To picked up the pieces again.’’ he took a deep breath, then continue. ‘’I wanted to call, but I knew if I did, I wouldn’t have the courage to be away from you again. I know, If I hear your voice, I wouldn’t have the strength to resist myself from crawling down your feet and asked you for another chance.’’
‘’But I would always give you another chance, you know that.’’ Adam’s voice cracked. Kris reached out to rubbed his back.
‘’Yeah, I know. That’s why I need to go away for awhile.’’
‘’But why?’’ now Adam sounded whiny.
‘’Because I wanted to be just the right one for you.’’
‘’But you are always the right one for me.’’ Now Adam turned to him, looking at him with those big sad eyes.
'’I wanted to be in a state where I could give my hundred percent to you. I just needed some time to get away from all of these and just think about what I want, and what I really need. Not that I’m confused of what it really was. But I just need time. I don’t want to jumped from one relationship to another. I don’t want to be like I had ended things with Alexis, then the next minute I would jump at you and ready to have a relationship with you. I just don’t think that was right. You deserve better than that. So, I went home to Conway.’’
‘’But, what took you so long?’’ He whispered. He didn’t want to think about the possibility that Kris had found someone else while he was there. But he needed to know. ‘’Have you found some-someone else?’’
Kris looked at him lovingly, he gazed up at him like he always did since they were 17. His heart’s flutters and he started to have some butterflies in his stomach. Kris leaned up and kissed him. Kris Allen, the love of his life was kissing him. If this was a dream, he didn’t want to wake up. Kris lifted his hand to caressed his face, while the other was at Adam’s back. Adam closed his eyes and kissed him back, opening his mouth to allow Kris’ tongue to explore inside. They kissed passionately like a lovers who had been separated for 4 long years. Except for the fact that they really were. When they finally pulled because the air became vital again, Kris held his hands and looked at him. Adam could see the happiness in Kris’ eyes, maybe he had it too, and Kris could see it in his eyes how euphoric it really was for him.
‘’There’s no one else, Adam. It’s only been you. All this time, here...’’ he raised their twined hands to his heart. ‘’There’s only been you.’’
Adam couldn’t help but cry, he was so not expecting this when he stood up in front of his mirror hours ago. Hell, he did even thought that having Kris again was close to impossible. But here they were, and here he was, he was given yet another chance. He was so happy and couldn’t ask for more.
‘’I’m sor-‘’
‘’No, no more sorry, please. We both made mistake. Let’s just start all over again. Stop crying, babe.’’
‘’But I can’t,’’ he sniffled some more. ‘’ I really thought you had forgotten about me.’’
‘’But I couldn’t, even if I tried. I love you, I’ll always will. You may think I haven’t think about you, or missed you. But you were always there with me. You were always near me, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.’’ Then he pulled out the necklace from inside his shirt. Adam’s eyes widen, he couldn’t believe this. ‘’See, you were there with me.’’ It was the ring he left at that restaurant. Kris had kept it.
‘’I want it back.’’
‘’Can I?’’ Adam lift his hand to Kris, ready to have the ring in his finger. He was glowing in excitement. ‘’or I’ll just buy you another one.’’ Kris hesitated.
‘’Kris, I don’t need new or expensive ring. This ring is what I wanted. It’s perfect as it is.’’ Kris smiled at him lovingly, but his face became serious to emotional in a matter of a split second.
He held on Adam’s hand, put the ring on it, lift it up to his lips and kissed it. He closed his eyes as he felt the cold silver band on his lips. ‘’I love you, babe.’’
Adam was in tears. He cupped Kris’ face and leaned down to kiss him again. When they pulled off after few minutes, they hugged each other like it was only that time it finally hitthem that they were together again. After All this time, after all the pains, after all they’ve been through, it was still the two of them. The two of them who complete each other, like a missing puzzle. ‘’I love you, too.’’ Adam whispered, kissing Kris’ forehead. ‘’so, so, so much.’’
They just stayed there, holding each other. Like neither of them wanted to let go just yet. Kris’ back were now leaning to Adam’s chest, and Adam’s hands were on Kris’ belly. Holding each other, with an unspoken promises, they know this time would be just the beginning, that leads to their forever. They could feel it, see it in their eyes, feel it with their touch. They just stood there, rocking each other through the soft music from inside the house.
‘’You know, babe, I never thought anybody can pull off that attire of yours, except for you.’’ Adam said, breaking the stretching silence. Trying to humor his boyfriend. Kris shifted so he was facing Adam. ‘’where in the world you can see a suit paired with a beat up converse? Only Kris Allen.’’
‘’Jerk!’’ he tickled him on his waist. Adam threw his head back and laugh loudly. The sound that was so heavenly for Kris. ‘’Me, I love your hair tonight, babe.’’ He said, leaning back so he could looked up to Adam’s hair.
‘’You do?’’
‘’Yeah, it reminds me of... a nest?’’ Kris laugh at Adam’s expression. He looked so horrified, well who wouldn’t if someone would compare your hair to a ... nest? Certainly not Adam.
‘’Fuck me.’’
‘’ Only If you ask nicely, maybe I would consider.’’ Kris was loving it, he missed teasing Adam. He could spend the rest of his life teasing him. well, that was one of his plan.
'’Ass’’
‘’Well, if I remember it right, you do love my ass, don’t you?’’
‘’grrr... you’re so gonna pay for this Allen.’’
‘’Can’t wait.’’
EPILOGUE