there's a what in where..?
So I'm 38 weeks pregnant tomorrow and I have started to double take in the mirror. I've been this huge for so long, that I just kind of got used to the addition of extra belly, boobs etc. and as weird as it seems, although I have felt baby movements from 11 weeks (yes, really!), it's as though I didn't really realise a small child was in there.
Yes, we've had scans (five long ones, to be exact... plus a few quick ones here & there), and yes, I have always known where babies come from... but THERE'S A SMALL HUMAN IN THERE. It's really quite confusing if you think about it. Because it's really quite impossible when you think about it.
Anyway, I have resisted the urge to start drinking raspberry leaf tea, incase it brings labour on. But I am keen to give it a whirl, as apparently it's great for uterine strength/shortening labour. But I would feel so guilty making the baby come out before it was ready. Where does all this mother guilt come from?! Nobody told me about this...
So, we are still incredibly unprepared... No bassinet, no baby's room, just bought a pram and carseat, but the carseat isn't fitted properly. My excuse is that the baby will be sleeping in our room for as long as it will fit into a bassinet. Which is never very long. Which realistically means that we will eventually have to set the cot up in our room. There is no real room for this, but I don't want to put the poor little tacker in a room alone. How terrifying! Dutchie will be gone from the beginning of Sept, until the end of Oct... hmm. I am more than freaked out at this concept. Not only will he leave a 6ish wk old newborn and return to a three month old, but I will have no car (mainly because I have no licence), no partner, nobody to help at 3am when I am exhausted... We will have no support, stuck out in the middle of bumfucknowhere for 7/8wks. I have no idea how I will cope. And yet, I feel incredibly selfish, as other army wives don't even have their husbands there at the birth. So many Dads miss out on 12+ months of their child's life. And here I am complaining about a domestic training exercise. Still, I moved cities so it would be easier for him to go to work, and in the process, trapped myself alone, pregnant and away from my closest support... my friends. Well, I really shot myself in the foot with that one.
I feel so sleepy... I am happy, just stressed. And interested to see when this baby will come.
Yes, we've had scans (five long ones, to be exact... plus a few quick ones here & there), and yes, I have always known where babies come from... but THERE'S A SMALL HUMAN IN THERE. It's really quite confusing if you think about it. Because it's really quite impossible when you think about it.
Anyway, I have resisted the urge to start drinking raspberry leaf tea, incase it brings labour on. But I am keen to give it a whirl, as apparently it's great for uterine strength/shortening labour. But I would feel so guilty making the baby come out before it was ready. Where does all this mother guilt come from?! Nobody told me about this...
So, we are still incredibly unprepared... No bassinet, no baby's room, just bought a pram and carseat, but the carseat isn't fitted properly. My excuse is that the baby will be sleeping in our room for as long as it will fit into a bassinet. Which is never very long. Which realistically means that we will eventually have to set the cot up in our room. There is no real room for this, but I don't want to put the poor little tacker in a room alone. How terrifying! Dutchie will be gone from the beginning of Sept, until the end of Oct... hmm. I am more than freaked out at this concept. Not only will he leave a 6ish wk old newborn and return to a three month old, but I will have no car (mainly because I have no licence), no partner, nobody to help at 3am when I am exhausted... We will have no support, stuck out in the middle of bumfucknowhere for 7/8wks. I have no idea how I will cope. And yet, I feel incredibly selfish, as other army wives don't even have their husbands there at the birth. So many Dads miss out on 12+ months of their child's life. And here I am complaining about a domestic training exercise. Still, I moved cities so it would be easier for him to go to work, and in the process, trapped myself alone, pregnant and away from my closest support... my friends. Well, I really shot myself in the foot with that one.
I feel so sleepy... I am happy, just stressed. And interested to see when this baby will come.