i know i've already updated with this . but i dont care..
wow.. haven't updated in a while.
alright . pretty much .. ron's mother doesn't want me to hang around with him . see him and most likely talk to him.. this has crushed me. and im not joking when i say that. the words . made my eyes hurt and made me feel like it was difficult to breathe .. i've fallen for him . i have .. and for the weirdest reason . i dont really feel shame . i know i must have done something wrong .. i know i must have .. but WHAT!?!?!?!?!! i have no idea. right now . im not even sure if i should be writing this in here.. i dunno .. maybe this should be a private entry .. i dont even know what to say about this whole thing. . i just. .DONT . i dont think i can deal with this .. something i care about being taken away from me. . AGAIN . that's happened way to much this year so far.. it just has .. i've lost Adrian .. my favorite advice man . and Jeff . granted . .when i lost jeff . i hadn't seen him in months. . but now there's not even a chance i'd ever meet up with him again . that's the things that crush me. the fact that i wont be able to see someone again .. THAT'S WHAT HURTS ME . my sky is gray . and my waterfall . has dropped all it can. the rainbows are fading and all the sudden i feel like a shriveled being .. full of nothingness. NOTHING i tell you.. im so lost i cant even see straight but i cant stop this pain .. i wish i could .. oh my how i wish i could. . i cant help who i am. . i just .. cant.
'invaders blood marches through my veins . like giant radioactive rubber pants! the pants command me!! - Zim
R.i.P. Jeffrey=Scott=Smith-Adrian=Pollard.
i love most of you. - hug -
-Ellie.
alright . pretty much .. ron's mother doesn't want me to hang around with him . see him and most likely talk to him.. this has crushed me. and im not joking when i say that. the words . made my eyes hurt and made me feel like it was difficult to breathe .. i've fallen for him . i have .. and for the weirdest reason . i dont really feel shame . i know i must have done something wrong .. i know i must have .. but WHAT!?!?!?!?!! i have no idea. right now . im not even sure if i should be writing this in here.. i dunno .. maybe this should be a private entry .. i dont even know what to say about this whole thing. . i just. .DONT . i dont think i can deal with this .. something i care about being taken away from me. . AGAIN . that's happened way to much this year so far.. it just has .. i've lost Adrian .. my favorite advice man . and Jeff . granted . .when i lost jeff . i hadn't seen him in months. . but now there's not even a chance i'd ever meet up with him again . that's the things that crush me. the fact that i wont be able to see someone again .. THAT'S WHAT HURTS ME . my sky is gray . and my waterfall . has dropped all it can. the rainbows are fading and all the sudden i feel like a shriveled being .. full of nothingness. NOTHING i tell you.. im so lost i cant even see straight but i cant stop this pain .. i wish i could .. oh my how i wish i could. . i cant help who i am. . i just .. cant.
'invaders blood marches through my veins . like giant radioactive rubber pants! the pants command me!! - Zim
R.i.P. Jeffrey=Scott=Smith-Adrian=Pollard.
i love most of you. - hug -
-Ellie.