Its been a long long road....
WOW
Where to start, i dont even know where to begin...but its been a hell of a trip i know that i can say that much. SO anyways, my bday was like 6 days ago...woohoo. so that was boring, sit home by myself like usual....and do nothing, haha. i mean i even had to work that day...so that sucked. Well to start, im living in Kalispell, MT still....so thats quite amazing as it is. I mean i have actually stayed in one place for 2 months. And unless they give me a raise im quitting....cuz they keep forgetting to put it on there....and im still at $6.50/hr plus tips every thursday..i mean so its kinda nice when i work usually 80 hours 2 weeks...so around $450 paychecks with about $50 in tips for that 2 weeks...but i cant survive off of $500 every 2 weeks....especially with the price for rent and shit now adays. like a one bedroom being like $700/mo with also first last month rent and deposit so like $2100 to move in, i dont have that kinda money. so it sucks BADLY. But otherwise...im still living with mark and chris as my roommate...paying $200.mo to sleep on the carpet....which i cant stand by the way. So im living on the carpet and paying rent...what a life. i have no extra money to get a vehicle or anything, and i cant even get a cell phone with my bad credit...so i dont know what to do. SO anyways, if i get applications sent to me from people wanting me to live there, then i can fill them out and send them back...if i get a job somewhere then ill move there as long as im making somewhat a decent amount, and i have to keep my hair (mohawk) and piercings. I have 3 years+ for my experience in restaraunt business...thats prep cook/fryer. So anyways...ya thats my chances of moving if anyone wants me there, haha. SO anyways as far as life goes...Mark Sanders...still my best fucking friend in the whole fucking world!!! hell of a guy. He goes wherever i go, and we always have eachother back for anything. But i have met a couple girls here...but they seem to never work out. Cassie...we went out for like 4 days...and i didnt want a sex based relationship...so we were going 2 seperate ways. im looking to eventually settle down....wanting to be a dad. go on vacations...eventually buy a house and grow old with a wife and kids and shit...but i cant seem to find that anywhere....and im tired of looking...it needs to just come to me. the closest thing i found was this chick Meredith...i dont even know where to begin with this girl. I mean from talking...i thought this girl was everything plus some...but when we met, i realized that every person is really just another person, i mean sure she could offer alot more then all these other people and shit, and i wouldnt have such high trust issues either...so thats always good. but the problem is...i screwed that one up. theres no chance for me. i mean im the type of guy...where i will give up if the girl shows no interest...and well i depend on it too soon...and thats what prevents me to be in serious relationships...but i guess im learning from all this...and one day, i can say it helped me i hope. but this girl is beautiful...one u would have to see to believe....she has a really cute 16 month old kid Connor...(not sure about the spelling) but hes a kewl fucking kid...i hope my kids atleast like that whenever i finally have one. but anyways...yeah i guess since i screwed things up with her, i hope that she accepts my appology and that we can atleast be friends...i mean thats the least that i can hope for i guess....and if not...like they say theres many fish in the see...but i guess i pass up all the good ones, by making mistakes. Someday ill find a girl that wants to be with me for me...and will look past all this shit i look forward into life for...and will be able to talk things through and talk things out with me to be able to fix shit like that. but i mean whats for the best is for the best...i guess im just waiting for my day is what im saying...and when that day comes im gonna treasure it forever!!!! i cant wait to start a family and to be able to actually have a family and someone to love and for someone to love me. well for now im out...and will write again soon.
Where to start, i dont even know where to begin...but its been a hell of a trip i know that i can say that much. SO anyways, my bday was like 6 days ago...woohoo. so that was boring, sit home by myself like usual....and do nothing, haha. i mean i even had to work that day...so that sucked. Well to start, im living in Kalispell, MT still....so thats quite amazing as it is. I mean i have actually stayed in one place for 2 months. And unless they give me a raise im quitting....cuz they keep forgetting to put it on there....and im still at $6.50/hr plus tips every thursday..i mean so its kinda nice when i work usually 80 hours 2 weeks...so around $450 paychecks with about $50 in tips for that 2 weeks...but i cant survive off of $500 every 2 weeks....especially with the price for rent and shit now adays. like a one bedroom being like $700/mo with also first last month rent and deposit so like $2100 to move in, i dont have that kinda money. so it sucks BADLY. But otherwise...im still living with mark and chris as my roommate...paying $200.mo to sleep on the carpet....which i cant stand by the way. So im living on the carpet and paying rent...what a life. i have no extra money to get a vehicle or anything, and i cant even get a cell phone with my bad credit...so i dont know what to do. SO anyways, if i get applications sent to me from people wanting me to live there, then i can fill them out and send them back...if i get a job somewhere then ill move there as long as im making somewhat a decent amount, and i have to keep my hair (mohawk) and piercings. I have 3 years+ for my experience in restaraunt business...thats prep cook/fryer. So anyways...ya thats my chances of moving if anyone wants me there, haha. SO anyways as far as life goes...Mark Sanders...still my best fucking friend in the whole fucking world!!! hell of a guy. He goes wherever i go, and we always have eachother back for anything. But i have met a couple girls here...but they seem to never work out. Cassie...we went out for like 4 days...and i didnt want a sex based relationship...so we were going 2 seperate ways. im looking to eventually settle down....wanting to be a dad. go on vacations...eventually buy a house and grow old with a wife and kids and shit...but i cant seem to find that anywhere....and im tired of looking...it needs to just come to me. the closest thing i found was this chick Meredith...i dont even know where to begin with this girl. I mean from talking...i thought this girl was everything plus some...but when we met, i realized that every person is really just another person, i mean sure she could offer alot more then all these other people and shit, and i wouldnt have such high trust issues either...so thats always good. but the problem is...i screwed that one up. theres no chance for me. i mean im the type of guy...where i will give up if the girl shows no interest...and well i depend on it too soon...and thats what prevents me to be in serious relationships...but i guess im learning from all this...and one day, i can say it helped me i hope. but this girl is beautiful...one u would have to see to believe....she has a really cute 16 month old kid Connor...(not sure about the spelling) but hes a kewl fucking kid...i hope my kids atleast like that whenever i finally have one. but anyways...yeah i guess since i screwed things up with her, i hope that she accepts my appology and that we can atleast be friends...i mean thats the least that i can hope for i guess....and if not...like they say theres many fish in the see...but i guess i pass up all the good ones, by making mistakes. Someday ill find a girl that wants to be with me for me...and will look past all this shit i look forward into life for...and will be able to talk things through and talk things out with me to be able to fix shit like that. but i mean whats for the best is for the best...i guess im just waiting for my day is what im saying...and when that day comes im gonna treasure it forever!!!! i cant wait to start a family and to be able to actually have a family and someone to love and for someone to love me. well for now im out...and will write again soon.