Hey Hey Hey, I'm Fat Albert
Everyones been posting preachy bitching LJ updates lately, so I figured I'd tell you about something that pisses me off to no end. Fat people.
Fat people are worthless wastes of life. I'm not talking about ones that have something glandular or some bullshit and accept it, I'm talking about the fat fucks that bitch about being fat. Yeah, dont eat that second donut you fat fuck.
Let me tell you a story about a moderately overweight boy. He stopped eating shit and drinking beer (switched to vodka and powerade...delicous) and lost 35 pounds. I'm still fat but only by like 15 pounds, which i need to keep to stay warm in the winter. Why dont you fat fucks stop eating so much? If you'd just fucking stop eating your salads drenched in buttermilk ranch maybe you could put off a few pounds.
But no, they refuse to do that. In fact, they blame society for making them fat. How the fuck are you gonna actually sue mcdonalds for making you fat? Because they make hamburgers with 1500 calories doesnt mean you need to eat there twice a day. Nobody is forcing you to eat at mcdonalds. BUt these fat worthless pieces of shit think its a good idea to sue mcdonalds because theyre fat. Now mcdonalds doesnt fucking have supersizes anymore. So because some fat fuck doesnt understand that if you're already fat you dont need to have extra soda and fries, I cant get a supersized big mac. Not that I would even eat at mcdonalds (first off its the worst of the fast food restaurants, second its fucking fattening), but now I dont have the freedom to get a lot of fries. What fucking good is this doing? If youre fat and want it enough you'll just get two orders of fries. thats right, fat people are fucking tenacious when they want their food.
ON this matter, I also fucking hate people that bitch about cigarrettes. "Oh, I didnt know that smoking marlboro reds would be bad for me." yeah, theres a reason they call them cowboy killers. i think its pretty obvious that theyre not good. but now everyone has to go and sue tobacco companies. why? they fucking provide a good for people that want it. i smoke when i'm drunk, if i get emphyzema (which wont happen because i'm not a fucking slave to nicotine) i'm not gonna go sue anyone. now the tobacco companies have to make commercials telling people not to smoke. thats retarded. now ciggarrettes are taxed at like 300%. fucking $9 for a pack in nyc. in virginia theyre like $2.25 a pack. is that fucking right? do we really need to tax things to prevent people from doing them? and what about joe camel. he was a childhood hero of mine. not really but he was awesome. i remember seeing ciggarrette commercials on tv. they were awesome. i remember when people were allowed to drink beer in beer commercials. wtf is wrong with society today?
so in conclusion, i hate fat people, i hate people that dont like tobacco companies, and i like bananas.
Fat people are worthless wastes of life. I'm not talking about ones that have something glandular or some bullshit and accept it, I'm talking about the fat fucks that bitch about being fat. Yeah, dont eat that second donut you fat fuck.
Let me tell you a story about a moderately overweight boy. He stopped eating shit and drinking beer (switched to vodka and powerade...delicous) and lost 35 pounds. I'm still fat but only by like 15 pounds, which i need to keep to stay warm in the winter. Why dont you fat fucks stop eating so much? If you'd just fucking stop eating your salads drenched in buttermilk ranch maybe you could put off a few pounds.
But no, they refuse to do that. In fact, they blame society for making them fat. How the fuck are you gonna actually sue mcdonalds for making you fat? Because they make hamburgers with 1500 calories doesnt mean you need to eat there twice a day. Nobody is forcing you to eat at mcdonalds. BUt these fat worthless pieces of shit think its a good idea to sue mcdonalds because theyre fat. Now mcdonalds doesnt fucking have supersizes anymore. So because some fat fuck doesnt understand that if you're already fat you dont need to have extra soda and fries, I cant get a supersized big mac. Not that I would even eat at mcdonalds (first off its the worst of the fast food restaurants, second its fucking fattening), but now I dont have the freedom to get a lot of fries. What fucking good is this doing? If youre fat and want it enough you'll just get two orders of fries. thats right, fat people are fucking tenacious when they want their food.
ON this matter, I also fucking hate people that bitch about cigarrettes. "Oh, I didnt know that smoking marlboro reds would be bad for me." yeah, theres a reason they call them cowboy killers. i think its pretty obvious that theyre not good. but now everyone has to go and sue tobacco companies. why? they fucking provide a good for people that want it. i smoke when i'm drunk, if i get emphyzema (which wont happen because i'm not a fucking slave to nicotine) i'm not gonna go sue anyone. now the tobacco companies have to make commercials telling people not to smoke. thats retarded. now ciggarrettes are taxed at like 300%. fucking $9 for a pack in nyc. in virginia theyre like $2.25 a pack. is that fucking right? do we really need to tax things to prevent people from doing them? and what about joe camel. he was a childhood hero of mine. not really but he was awesome. i remember seeing ciggarrette commercials on tv. they were awesome. i remember when people were allowed to drink beer in beer commercials. wtf is wrong with society today?
so in conclusion, i hate fat people, i hate people that dont like tobacco companies, and i like bananas.