Meme, Weekend, AP Tests and Class, etc.
Your Extroversion Profile:Assertiveness: Very HighFriendliness: Very HighSociability: HighCheerfulness: MediumExcitement Seeking: MediumActivity Level: Very Low
How Extroverted Are You?
The day looks promising when I feel prettier without eyeliner on and smell fresh and nice.
I figured out that my hair looks really good if I leave it down when it's drying, even if it's initially puffy.
I'm going to go to Shop Rite and Target with my father on a beautiful Sunday (I don't really like driving, so I don't think I will even though practice is good for me).
Yesterday I hung out with Eric. We watched movies and explored my back yard forest/got lost and found this hidden/lovely house whose fence we had to jump in order to find a road. Their huge, equally beautiful yard was fenced off in one part.. and had goats. Who started bleating and quickly trotting towards us as we approached them. I picked up a cluster of fallen lilacs, and they smelled wonderful. My back yard forest is an adventure with every visit. It's beautiful.. we have three streams, the third of which has a large, fallen tree jutting at an angle which is perfect for straddling and forgetting how time passing feels, and despite yourself, letting brief thoughts of Thoreau trickle in.
On Friday night, Corinne came over. We talked, had nachos, and did Salvia. The only thing lighting my room was a candle that smells like boys' cologne and sometimes a lamp. Corinne made the pipe all on her very own, that crafty little thing. I love Corinne, seriously. We fell asleep across my bed (we're both small, so we can do that), and at one point I woke up and spread a blanket across us. It was wonderul. We're going to put some color in her hair the next time we hang out (she wants yellow, which is excellent, as her hair is very dark and the bleach will make it light yellow to begin with.) I'm wondering if people would pay me to do that to their hair? I'm my own walking advertisement.
When I get home later, I have to draw/color three phoenixes and two of their feathers for the literary magazine. I drew/colored the cover some weekday morning during gym and history class. The drawing doesn't look bad (it's a phoenix feather sitting on a little pile of ashes with the tip on fire/sprinkling a few ashes down), but it would have been even better if I had taken time with it. But I'm just being critical. The magazine should be way tighter than last year's. Good god, I hope so. They're giving us completely free reign with the budget, which surprised me greatly.. that means the whole thing can be in color. Nice.
The contacts should be in soon.. I'll still wear my glasses, though. I love having a little star sticker on the corner of them. If I had to get a tattoo, it would have a star. I won't, though, because what are the odds I'll still like it when I'm fifty? It would have to be something very intelligently and creatively designed for its allure to last for that long.
If I don't get my license within the first two tests, I'll be very disappointed. I think I will. The only things I can imagine having issues with are parking and turns, and that's not even terribly tricky. Driving in Manhattan is another story entirely. Ick. The driving thing is important because I live in the middle of nowhere and also because my boyfriend who I miss very much lives far away. Can you imagine being in love with someone and simply not being able to touch him at all, ever, let alone ever see him? You would wonder as to how someone could possibly keep going like that, but if you were me, you would know every time you hear his voice that the answer to that is very simple.
My track tan will be spectacular by the time the season is over at this rate. So far I'm getting sock and shorts tanlines, and the T-shirt one is going strong. The best ones are the ones on my fingers, from my rings. And I don't even deliberately sit out in the sun. I don't wear sunscreen either simply because I haven't found the one that I want, which is stupid because it's by Neutrogena and stores should have it.
Picture post soon.
Oh yeah, and, I had an AP English exam on Monday and an AP history one this Friday. Also, I had a math test on Wednesday and a track meet that went from 12:30 to about 9:30 on Thursday. Yes, that is approximately nine hours of track, an entire day at a conference meet watching amazing runners and sitting in the shade of a tent on high bleachers. I talked to Eric and Nick the entire time, basically, because I sat with the boys instead of the girls (girls in large groups is a very take-or-leave idea, for me).
In any case, if I don't get a four on the AP English exam I'll be surprised. The history one... I think I did just fine on the multiple choice section, but good god, whoever chose those essays must have been hand-selected by Satan himself. I'm going to say that's partially because I could have studied harder, but I know it's not just me when everyone else who took it made the same grimace when I asked them about it. I'll be happy if I get a three on that, honestly. My one genius friend, Mike, didn't even get to his third essay, so with minutes left he wrote a thank-you note to the AP essay readers instead. I love it.
AP chemistry is going to be ridiculously easy, and this is why: I expect nothing better than a one on that, simply because you cannot get a zero. They have to give you a one, even if you don't answer any of the questions. So, by banking on a one and lowering my expectations to that level, I've abolished all possibilities of disappointment. That's not to say I won't try, of course. I'm not being pessimistic, only realistic. This is how much of a failure I am at chemistry. I'm surprised I even passed the last marking period, even if it was right on the line. I'm still undecided on exactly why I did so badly at that class this year. I did try very hard in the beginning, but once you see how ridiculously bad of a teacher mine is, it's not really difficult to see how despite my efforts I was still very much lost. To anyone who has Mr. Gessner's class sophomore year - GOOD LUCK to you if you want to jump up to AP the next year. You're going from one kind of shitty teacher to one really shitty teacher, skipping lots of basical material you should have a really good grasp on, and you're generally screwing yourself over really badly (unless you're good at math, in which case you stand a chance because there's equations and shit you need to know). I, not being very good at math, liked chemistry for the things that didn't involve equations; of course, these are the things we don't really learn about, and fuck do I hate that class. I swear to god, how can she possibly expect us to learn fucking thermonuclear chemistry in ONE DAY? No wonder not ONE student got a five on the AP exam last year. God, I'd give anyone a fucking huge pat on the back if he or she got a four. This coming week will be absolutely sparkingly bright, as we have a chemistry final on Monday and Tuesday (oh yes, a final that extends over three periods) and, of course, the AP chemistry test on Wednesday. So yes, that is not one, not two, but THREE days of chemistry in a row, the last of which will be three hours straight of it. I am fucking ELATED over that, I assure you. At least I can listen to my iPod the ENTIRE TIME, as I have already done so during the other two AP tests and SHE WON'T EVEN FUCKING BE THERE FOR OUR FINAL. Her son is graduating from somewhere prestigious, and while that is understandable, I feel it still begs the question "WHAT THE FUCK?"
That's chemistry for you.
So all in all, I rocked the face off of the AP English one (I hope, but watch me get a three on it, seriously), flailed through the history one once I had to write the goddamned essays, and am very zen about the chemistry one in an existential kind of way in that failure is inevitable and I hate that class and that subject at this point anyway, so really, what's the big deal? The exams are only for college credits anyway.
Why couldn't we have just learned about chemistry in explosives and chemicals like I had wanted to in the first place? The only thing that got me interested in taking the course was reading The Anarchist's Cookbook, though I am by no means a pyromaniac.
I'm finally reading 1984. It's good. I'll always like reading.. after this it's probably more Murakami, though I do want to re-read some LeRoy and James St. James. Kelly seriously needs to take these books away from me. I still haven't read Diary by Palahniuk, either. And I really need to get started on my research paper on Cummings. I really don't know how taking Breslin's AP English class is going to go next year, as Kitching has spoiled us with giving pretty much no homework ever and Breslin is pretty much is exact opposite in every way, that statement extending to the way his class is run. He'd better like class discussions, though, because I love having those when the teacher gets involved and responds to what you say. I am really, really, REALLY going to miss Petrella (my history teacher). She is honestly one of if not the best teacher I've ever had. And for our AP History test, she actually made us all cookies and got us juice for the break! How fucking awesome of her is that?!? She and Kitching are the only ones who prepared us for the AP tests, though Kitching did it in an entirely subtle way. Petrella, though, went all-out and honestly seemed to care about it. She's really a wonderful teacher.. and actually cares about how we do. I am so glad I had her. I hope she'll let me go to AP history next year; it's my goal to do very well this marking period, as there is a grade requriement, too. I know she likes me, but if I don't have the average then she can't do anything about that. I'm turning into one of those students who could do really well if I applied myself, but I just don't. Whenever I tell people that I'm going to apply to Boston University even though I highly doubt I'll get in, they start assuring me that I will because I'm smart. And my one friend, Kerri, goes to far as to start exclaiming and dismissing my protests, telling me I'm a genius. My response is, what are you talking about?! My grades aren't even that good! It doesn't even matter, because I'm most likely going to Rutger's, as it's cheaper and that's what my mother wants. And Rutger's isn't a bad school.. and I'm very sedate about college at the moment anyway.
I find I don't get terribly excited about a lot of things these days. Not that that's bad. It's just hard to move me like that. This is seemingly incongruous with my mixed-up temperament.
Beep beep beep!
How Extroverted Are You?
The day looks promising when I feel prettier without eyeliner on and smell fresh and nice.
I figured out that my hair looks really good if I leave it down when it's drying, even if it's initially puffy.
I'm going to go to Shop Rite and Target with my father on a beautiful Sunday (I don't really like driving, so I don't think I will even though practice is good for me).
Yesterday I hung out with Eric. We watched movies and explored my back yard forest/got lost and found this hidden/lovely house whose fence we had to jump in order to find a road. Their huge, equally beautiful yard was fenced off in one part.. and had goats. Who started bleating and quickly trotting towards us as we approached them. I picked up a cluster of fallen lilacs, and they smelled wonderful. My back yard forest is an adventure with every visit. It's beautiful.. we have three streams, the third of which has a large, fallen tree jutting at an angle which is perfect for straddling and forgetting how time passing feels, and despite yourself, letting brief thoughts of Thoreau trickle in.
On Friday night, Corinne came over. We talked, had nachos, and did Salvia. The only thing lighting my room was a candle that smells like boys' cologne and sometimes a lamp. Corinne made the pipe all on her very own, that crafty little thing. I love Corinne, seriously. We fell asleep across my bed (we're both small, so we can do that), and at one point I woke up and spread a blanket across us. It was wonderul. We're going to put some color in her hair the next time we hang out (she wants yellow, which is excellent, as her hair is very dark and the bleach will make it light yellow to begin with.) I'm wondering if people would pay me to do that to their hair? I'm my own walking advertisement.
When I get home later, I have to draw/color three phoenixes and two of their feathers for the literary magazine. I drew/colored the cover some weekday morning during gym and history class. The drawing doesn't look bad (it's a phoenix feather sitting on a little pile of ashes with the tip on fire/sprinkling a few ashes down), but it would have been even better if I had taken time with it. But I'm just being critical. The magazine should be way tighter than last year's. Good god, I hope so. They're giving us completely free reign with the budget, which surprised me greatly.. that means the whole thing can be in color. Nice.
The contacts should be in soon.. I'll still wear my glasses, though. I love having a little star sticker on the corner of them. If I had to get a tattoo, it would have a star. I won't, though, because what are the odds I'll still like it when I'm fifty? It would have to be something very intelligently and creatively designed for its allure to last for that long.
If I don't get my license within the first two tests, I'll be very disappointed. I think I will. The only things I can imagine having issues with are parking and turns, and that's not even terribly tricky. Driving in Manhattan is another story entirely. Ick. The driving thing is important because I live in the middle of nowhere and also because my boyfriend who I miss very much lives far away. Can you imagine being in love with someone and simply not being able to touch him at all, ever, let alone ever see him? You would wonder as to how someone could possibly keep going like that, but if you were me, you would know every time you hear his voice that the answer to that is very simple.
My track tan will be spectacular by the time the season is over at this rate. So far I'm getting sock and shorts tanlines, and the T-shirt one is going strong. The best ones are the ones on my fingers, from my rings. And I don't even deliberately sit out in the sun. I don't wear sunscreen either simply because I haven't found the one that I want, which is stupid because it's by Neutrogena and stores should have it.
Picture post soon.
Oh yeah, and, I had an AP English exam on Monday and an AP history one this Friday. Also, I had a math test on Wednesday and a track meet that went from 12:30 to about 9:30 on Thursday. Yes, that is approximately nine hours of track, an entire day at a conference meet watching amazing runners and sitting in the shade of a tent on high bleachers. I talked to Eric and Nick the entire time, basically, because I sat with the boys instead of the girls (girls in large groups is a very take-or-leave idea, for me).
In any case, if I don't get a four on the AP English exam I'll be surprised. The history one... I think I did just fine on the multiple choice section, but good god, whoever chose those essays must have been hand-selected by Satan himself. I'm going to say that's partially because I could have studied harder, but I know it's not just me when everyone else who took it made the same grimace when I asked them about it. I'll be happy if I get a three on that, honestly. My one genius friend, Mike, didn't even get to his third essay, so with minutes left he wrote a thank-you note to the AP essay readers instead. I love it.
AP chemistry is going to be ridiculously easy, and this is why: I expect nothing better than a one on that, simply because you cannot get a zero. They have to give you a one, even if you don't answer any of the questions. So, by banking on a one and lowering my expectations to that level, I've abolished all possibilities of disappointment. That's not to say I won't try, of course. I'm not being pessimistic, only realistic. This is how much of a failure I am at chemistry. I'm surprised I even passed the last marking period, even if it was right on the line. I'm still undecided on exactly why I did so badly at that class this year. I did try very hard in the beginning, but once you see how ridiculously bad of a teacher mine is, it's not really difficult to see how despite my efforts I was still very much lost. To anyone who has Mr. Gessner's class sophomore year - GOOD LUCK to you if you want to jump up to AP the next year. You're going from one kind of shitty teacher to one really shitty teacher, skipping lots of basical material you should have a really good grasp on, and you're generally screwing yourself over really badly (unless you're good at math, in which case you stand a chance because there's equations and shit you need to know). I, not being very good at math, liked chemistry for the things that didn't involve equations; of course, these are the things we don't really learn about, and fuck do I hate that class. I swear to god, how can she possibly expect us to learn fucking thermonuclear chemistry in ONE DAY? No wonder not ONE student got a five on the AP exam last year. God, I'd give anyone a fucking huge pat on the back if he or she got a four. This coming week will be absolutely sparkingly bright, as we have a chemistry final on Monday and Tuesday (oh yes, a final that extends over three periods) and, of course, the AP chemistry test on Wednesday. So yes, that is not one, not two, but THREE days of chemistry in a row, the last of which will be three hours straight of it. I am fucking ELATED over that, I assure you. At least I can listen to my iPod the ENTIRE TIME, as I have already done so during the other two AP tests and SHE WON'T EVEN FUCKING BE THERE FOR OUR FINAL. Her son is graduating from somewhere prestigious, and while that is understandable, I feel it still begs the question "WHAT THE FUCK?"
That's chemistry for you.
So all in all, I rocked the face off of the AP English one (I hope, but watch me get a three on it, seriously), flailed through the history one once I had to write the goddamned essays, and am very zen about the chemistry one in an existential kind of way in that failure is inevitable and I hate that class and that subject at this point anyway, so really, what's the big deal? The exams are only for college credits anyway.
Why couldn't we have just learned about chemistry in explosives and chemicals like I had wanted to in the first place? The only thing that got me interested in taking the course was reading The Anarchist's Cookbook, though I am by no means a pyromaniac.
I'm finally reading 1984. It's good. I'll always like reading.. after this it's probably more Murakami, though I do want to re-read some LeRoy and James St. James. Kelly seriously needs to take these books away from me. I still haven't read Diary by Palahniuk, either. And I really need to get started on my research paper on Cummings. I really don't know how taking Breslin's AP English class is going to go next year, as Kitching has spoiled us with giving pretty much no homework ever and Breslin is pretty much is exact opposite in every way, that statement extending to the way his class is run. He'd better like class discussions, though, because I love having those when the teacher gets involved and responds to what you say. I am really, really, REALLY going to miss Petrella (my history teacher). She is honestly one of if not the best teacher I've ever had. And for our AP History test, she actually made us all cookies and got us juice for the break! How fucking awesome of her is that?!? She and Kitching are the only ones who prepared us for the AP tests, though Kitching did it in an entirely subtle way. Petrella, though, went all-out and honestly seemed to care about it. She's really a wonderful teacher.. and actually cares about how we do. I am so glad I had her. I hope she'll let me go to AP history next year; it's my goal to do very well this marking period, as there is a grade requriement, too. I know she likes me, but if I don't have the average then she can't do anything about that. I'm turning into one of those students who could do really well if I applied myself, but I just don't. Whenever I tell people that I'm going to apply to Boston University even though I highly doubt I'll get in, they start assuring me that I will because I'm smart. And my one friend, Kerri, goes to far as to start exclaiming and dismissing my protests, telling me I'm a genius. My response is, what are you talking about?! My grades aren't even that good! It doesn't even matter, because I'm most likely going to Rutger's, as it's cheaper and that's what my mother wants. And Rutger's isn't a bad school.. and I'm very sedate about college at the moment anyway.
I find I don't get terribly excited about a lot of things these days. Not that that's bad. It's just hard to move me like that. This is seemingly incongruous with my mixed-up temperament.
Beep beep beep!