(no subject)
its almost 9:30 on sunday morning... i worked 9 hours yesterday and i would absolutly be sleeping right now, but everytime i lay down i get so conjested i have a coughing fit. so the point is i'm up..obviously.
i'll just get right into whats on my mind
i'm not gonna lie, i'm terrified of letting go. all throughout highschool i was so "ugh i can't wait until i graduate, i don't have to see all of the assholes that i don't like anymore" and part of me is still all for that, but most of me is...terrified.
i hate not being able to see how things are going to end up. i'm not dissappointed with the college that i picked, but i feel like making friends isn't going to be the same..and the friends that i meet aren't going to be anywhere as close as those that i have now.
the biggest thing i am going to miss is the music department. knowing that i'll never perform again (besides st joseph's chorus which i heard was miserable) is an extreme dissappointment. i didn't want to major in music, but i just feel like it's dropping out of my life and thats really hard to accept when it played such a huge role in it for the last 4 years.
i think i'm probably the worst out of everyone...i cried in Virginia in the hotel room when i hugged Casey Allison and Katie. and again at the banquet. the last day of school is such an exciting yet dreaded day for me.
i guess everyone has to move on but i guess i'm not as ready as i always thought i would be. and it sucks. it sucks because i never felt like i had any guidence when it came to talking about college, it sucks because i dont think i'd be satisfied with any school i went to, unlike most people who are really excited. and well i'm glad for them. i hope that they meet many new people but i still hope they always come back.
i shouldn't be worrying about this now anyway because well..the beginning of the summer is starting in two days. i plan on this being the best summer of my life thanks:)..and its going to be hard to beat last summer.
on that note...see ya
i'll just get right into whats on my mind
i'm not gonna lie, i'm terrified of letting go. all throughout highschool i was so "ugh i can't wait until i graduate, i don't have to see all of the assholes that i don't like anymore" and part of me is still all for that, but most of me is...terrified.
i hate not being able to see how things are going to end up. i'm not dissappointed with the college that i picked, but i feel like making friends isn't going to be the same..and the friends that i meet aren't going to be anywhere as close as those that i have now.
the biggest thing i am going to miss is the music department. knowing that i'll never perform again (besides st joseph's chorus which i heard was miserable) is an extreme dissappointment. i didn't want to major in music, but i just feel like it's dropping out of my life and thats really hard to accept when it played such a huge role in it for the last 4 years.
i think i'm probably the worst out of everyone...i cried in Virginia in the hotel room when i hugged Casey Allison and Katie. and again at the banquet. the last day of school is such an exciting yet dreaded day for me.
i guess everyone has to move on but i guess i'm not as ready as i always thought i would be. and it sucks. it sucks because i never felt like i had any guidence when it came to talking about college, it sucks because i dont think i'd be satisfied with any school i went to, unlike most people who are really excited. and well i'm glad for them. i hope that they meet many new people but i still hope they always come back.
i shouldn't be worrying about this now anyway because well..the beginning of the summer is starting in two days. i plan on this being the best summer of my life thanks:)..and its going to be hard to beat last summer.
on that note...see ya