Out of my head...
Its one of those things where you know you shouldn't, but you do and unsure of the future consequences...things get a little out of hand. I can't say I didn't know it could happen, but it wasn't something I was prepared for. In fact, it was something I don't think my mind can ever really prepare myself for or even wrap my mind around. But wasn't that the idea?
Maybe.
But it went to far. But everything is fine. Do I feel embarrassed, not really, I've grown past feeling embarrassed for my actions. I just wish it wouldn't have accelerated that quickly, or if I could have known how impossibly out this world things would have gone...if I would have known, this wouldn't have happened.
Ugh. Wrestling with my mind is never productive. You can over things in your mind, but does that help? Not really.
So today, I will shower. I will do some laundry. I will try so hard to not think, but I know I will. I'll face the wrath soon enough. But all I want is to be held, but there is absolutely nothing I can do until Monday. And even then, I'm a little afraid of how my reception will be taken.
Why do I find a way to messing myself up? I just couldn't put it down...
Maybe.
But it went to far. But everything is fine. Do I feel embarrassed, not really, I've grown past feeling embarrassed for my actions. I just wish it wouldn't have accelerated that quickly, or if I could have known how impossibly out this world things would have gone...if I would have known, this wouldn't have happened.
Ugh. Wrestling with my mind is never productive. You can over things in your mind, but does that help? Not really.
So today, I will shower. I will do some laundry. I will try so hard to not think, but I know I will. I'll face the wrath soon enough. But all I want is to be held, but there is absolutely nothing I can do until Monday. And even then, I'm a little afraid of how my reception will be taken.
Why do I find a way to messing myself up? I just couldn't put it down...