SJA fic : Satellite Series : Final Heartbeat
Title : Final Heartbeat
Author : Jen
Fandom : The Sarah Jane Adventures
Rating : PG
Characters : Sarah Jane, the Doctor, Nicole, Scott
Spoilers : parts 1 and 3 of the Satellite Series
Summary : twenty nine years to the day and now the Universe has come to collect
~~
It didn't feel like a heart attack but she knew that was what it would look like. When this was over, when they investigated, that would be their conclusion.
So this was it then.
~~
They'd separated, the old 'divide and conquer' tactic. Scott was with Nic - he was almost surgically attached to his wife's side every time she went out these days - and Sarah had thought nothing of going after one of the bounty hunters herself. For a moment she'd been getting somewhere with him, convincing him that his bounty wasn't on Earth, that he should be looking elsewhere. Then he had seen Nic and Scott talking to his competition and he has assumed that she was making a deal to protect the man - his assumed target.
When he'd taken aim at her daughter Sarah's response had been automatic and immediate. At first she'd not felt anything, just watched as he'd taken off after his competition. She'd stayed on her feet long enough to see that Scott had pulled Nic to safety. Knowing she was safe, that she was protected, was all she needed and then it hit her. The wall of pain, the disappearing strength, and the impact of the ground as she crashed to it.
~~
"Sarah?"
His voice was soft, the new cadence already ingrained in her mind and she forced her eyes open.
"Hey there," he smiled gently at her. "Had me worried for a moment."
"Doctor," she whispered. "I..."
"It's OK," he soothed, helping her to a sitting position against the crates. "It'll be OK."
"Nic..."
"She's fine. She's safe. They've gone, she and Scott are looking for you."
"I..." she began, then she finally caught his gaze. And she knew.
"It'll be OK," he repeated. "I promise."
"I'm supposed to protect her," Sarah whispered. "The Universe..."
"It's been twenty nine years," he told her gently. "Twenty nine years to the day since you decided to keep her. Today, Sarah. It's today. Twenty nine years with Peter, twenty nine years with Nicole." He noticed the flash of panic in her eyes and shook his head gently. "You and Nicole. You're the same, Sarah. She is you and you are her."
"So... me... for her?"
The Doctor nodded.
Sarah pressed her lips together and nodded slightly. "Then I'm OK with this."
"Oh Sarah..." he breathed, reaching out with one hand to cup her jaw.
"Really. I'm OK. If she's safe..."
"Oh she's more than safe, Sarah," he smiled, reaching into his jacket pocket. He pulled out a photo which he pressed into her hands.
Every cell in her body seemed like it was on fire but Nic and Scott were here, looking for her, and she was not giving up on them just yet. She glanced down at the photo he had given to her and suddenly the pain seemed to be on pause. Not gone, but not intensifying as it had been.
"It's a boy," she breathed, looking at the eldest child. Her fingertips ran down her grandson's face before moving to the two young girls stood with their parents.
"They're amazing," he assured her. "They're brilliant and amazing and fantastic and you would be so, so proud of them."
"She's OK?"
"She's OK."
Sarah nodded and the pause button was lifted; the pain spread further and deeper. It was getting harder to breathe now and it felt like her heart was struggling for every beat.
"You knew," she whispered, looking into those new and familiar eyes. "That's why you came today. You knew."
"I couldn't just leave it."
"I'm glad." Summoning as much strength as she could she lifted a hand to his face. "I loved you, you know that? All that time, all those adventures... And you broke my heart."
"I had to."
"I know, I know." She hissed slightly as the pain got the better of her, but composed herself quickly. "But thank you. For everything. Peter, Nicole..."
"The pleasure was all mine," he said. "You deserved this life, Sarah, you deserved to be happy."
"I was. I am."
"Even now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"This means she's safe?"
He nodded.
"Then even now."
"I'm so, so sorry."
"Don't be."
He smiled gently then glanced away. "They'll be here soon."
"Go on, it's OK," she said.
"It was an honour to know you, Sarah Jane. An absolute honour."
"You too," she smiled.
He hesitated for a moment before leaning forward and pressing his lips against hers in a gentle kiss goodbye. Then he was gone.
"MUM!"
The scream cut through the pain and Sarah forced her eyes open to see Nic running towards her. Her daughter crashed to her knees in front of her.
"It'll be OK, Mum, we'll get help..."
"No, no, no..." Sarah said quickly. "Sweetheart..."
"SCOTT!" Nic yelled. "Scott!"
"Listen to me, listen..."
"No," Nic said defiantly. "No, I'm not letting you."
"Nicole Grace!" Sarah snapped, drawing on her remaining strength.
"Please, Mum..."
"It's OK, little one, it's OK."
"How is this OK?" Nicole sobbed.
"The only regret I have is that I won't see this little one," Sarah said, moving a hand to brush against Nicole's baby bump. "But he'll be fine, I know it."
"Don't leave me, Mum. Please."
"I'm fine with this, love. Really. I know you've been worried but... don't be. This makes everything OK."
"What? It takes you instead of me?"
"You'll understand," Sarah told her. "When you hold your son, you'll know."
"My son?" she breathed.
Sarah smiled gently, pushing it onto her lips through the pain. "I love you. And Luke. Even fond of Scott."
"I love you." The tears were streaming down Nicole's face now and she reached out for her mother's hand. "I can't do this without you. Please..."
"One thing," Sarah said quietly, forcing her voice through a throat that didn't seem to want to co-operate, "if a man in a bow tie turns up... Be nice."
"What?" Nicole asked, looking up.
"Tell Luke I'm sorry and I love him," Sarah breathed. "I wish I could tell him myself, I wish..."
The pressure on her chest forced the last of the air from her lungs and suddenly she felt like she was drowning. Within seconds the dark patches that had been invading her peripheral vision pushed forward, blurring and then obscuring her daughter's face. The last thing she was aware of was a soft pressure on her hands as Nicole gripped on as hard as she could.
Then the darkness was absolute.
~~
Scott followed the sound of his wife's anguish, fearful of what he would find. After checking that she and the baby were OK he pulled her away from Sarah's body, holding her tightly as the devastation crippled her. The pair of them sat on the hard ground, rocking gently as their grief subsided to a point where they felt they could move.
Nicole's hand unfurled, revealing the photo she had removed from her mother's hand. The two of them looked at the picture; Nicole, Scott, a boy and two young girls. Nicole's hand drifted to her swollen stomach and she rubbed her bump gently as she leant back into her husband's body.
From his vantage point nearby the Doctor slid to the ground, his own tears running silently down his face. A red headed Scottish girl came and sat next to him.
"I'm sorry," she said gently before resting her head on his shoulder.
Separated by metres, years and lifetimes, the four of them mourned the loss of someone better than they themselves could ever hope to be.
~fin~
A/N : I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry!
Author : Jen
Fandom : The Sarah Jane Adventures
Rating : PG
Characters : Sarah Jane, the Doctor, Nicole, Scott
Spoilers : parts 1 and 3 of the Satellite Series
Summary : twenty nine years to the day and now the Universe has come to collect
~~
It didn't feel like a heart attack but she knew that was what it would look like. When this was over, when they investigated, that would be their conclusion.
So this was it then.
~~
They'd separated, the old 'divide and conquer' tactic. Scott was with Nic - he was almost surgically attached to his wife's side every time she went out these days - and Sarah had thought nothing of going after one of the bounty hunters herself. For a moment she'd been getting somewhere with him, convincing him that his bounty wasn't on Earth, that he should be looking elsewhere. Then he had seen Nic and Scott talking to his competition and he has assumed that she was making a deal to protect the man - his assumed target.
When he'd taken aim at her daughter Sarah's response had been automatic and immediate. At first she'd not felt anything, just watched as he'd taken off after his competition. She'd stayed on her feet long enough to see that Scott had pulled Nic to safety. Knowing she was safe, that she was protected, was all she needed and then it hit her. The wall of pain, the disappearing strength, and the impact of the ground as she crashed to it.
~~
"Sarah?"
His voice was soft, the new cadence already ingrained in her mind and she forced her eyes open.
"Hey there," he smiled gently at her. "Had me worried for a moment."
"Doctor," she whispered. "I..."
"It's OK," he soothed, helping her to a sitting position against the crates. "It'll be OK."
"Nic..."
"She's fine. She's safe. They've gone, she and Scott are looking for you."
"I..." she began, then she finally caught his gaze. And she knew.
"It'll be OK," he repeated. "I promise."
"I'm supposed to protect her," Sarah whispered. "The Universe..."
"It's been twenty nine years," he told her gently. "Twenty nine years to the day since you decided to keep her. Today, Sarah. It's today. Twenty nine years with Peter, twenty nine years with Nicole." He noticed the flash of panic in her eyes and shook his head gently. "You and Nicole. You're the same, Sarah. She is you and you are her."
"So... me... for her?"
The Doctor nodded.
Sarah pressed her lips together and nodded slightly. "Then I'm OK with this."
"Oh Sarah..." he breathed, reaching out with one hand to cup her jaw.
"Really. I'm OK. If she's safe..."
"Oh she's more than safe, Sarah," he smiled, reaching into his jacket pocket. He pulled out a photo which he pressed into her hands.
Every cell in her body seemed like it was on fire but Nic and Scott were here, looking for her, and she was not giving up on them just yet. She glanced down at the photo he had given to her and suddenly the pain seemed to be on pause. Not gone, but not intensifying as it had been.
"It's a boy," she breathed, looking at the eldest child. Her fingertips ran down her grandson's face before moving to the two young girls stood with their parents.
"They're amazing," he assured her. "They're brilliant and amazing and fantastic and you would be so, so proud of them."
"She's OK?"
"She's OK."
Sarah nodded and the pause button was lifted; the pain spread further and deeper. It was getting harder to breathe now and it felt like her heart was struggling for every beat.
"You knew," she whispered, looking into those new and familiar eyes. "That's why you came today. You knew."
"I couldn't just leave it."
"I'm glad." Summoning as much strength as she could she lifted a hand to his face. "I loved you, you know that? All that time, all those adventures... And you broke my heart."
"I had to."
"I know, I know." She hissed slightly as the pain got the better of her, but composed herself quickly. "But thank you. For everything. Peter, Nicole..."
"The pleasure was all mine," he said. "You deserved this life, Sarah, you deserved to be happy."
"I was. I am."
"Even now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"This means she's safe?"
He nodded.
"Then even now."
"I'm so, so sorry."
"Don't be."
He smiled gently then glanced away. "They'll be here soon."
"Go on, it's OK," she said.
"It was an honour to know you, Sarah Jane. An absolute honour."
"You too," she smiled.
He hesitated for a moment before leaning forward and pressing his lips against hers in a gentle kiss goodbye. Then he was gone.
"MUM!"
The scream cut through the pain and Sarah forced her eyes open to see Nic running towards her. Her daughter crashed to her knees in front of her.
"It'll be OK, Mum, we'll get help..."
"No, no, no..." Sarah said quickly. "Sweetheart..."
"SCOTT!" Nic yelled. "Scott!"
"Listen to me, listen..."
"No," Nic said defiantly. "No, I'm not letting you."
"Nicole Grace!" Sarah snapped, drawing on her remaining strength.
"Please, Mum..."
"It's OK, little one, it's OK."
"How is this OK?" Nicole sobbed.
"The only regret I have is that I won't see this little one," Sarah said, moving a hand to brush against Nicole's baby bump. "But he'll be fine, I know it."
"Don't leave me, Mum. Please."
"I'm fine with this, love. Really. I know you've been worried but... don't be. This makes everything OK."
"What? It takes you instead of me?"
"You'll understand," Sarah told her. "When you hold your son, you'll know."
"My son?" she breathed.
Sarah smiled gently, pushing it onto her lips through the pain. "I love you. And Luke. Even fond of Scott."
"I love you." The tears were streaming down Nicole's face now and she reached out for her mother's hand. "I can't do this without you. Please..."
"One thing," Sarah said quietly, forcing her voice through a throat that didn't seem to want to co-operate, "if a man in a bow tie turns up... Be nice."
"What?" Nicole asked, looking up.
"Tell Luke I'm sorry and I love him," Sarah breathed. "I wish I could tell him myself, I wish..."
The pressure on her chest forced the last of the air from her lungs and suddenly she felt like she was drowning. Within seconds the dark patches that had been invading her peripheral vision pushed forward, blurring and then obscuring her daughter's face. The last thing she was aware of was a soft pressure on her hands as Nicole gripped on as hard as she could.
Then the darkness was absolute.
~~
Scott followed the sound of his wife's anguish, fearful of what he would find. After checking that she and the baby were OK he pulled her away from Sarah's body, holding her tightly as the devastation crippled her. The pair of them sat on the hard ground, rocking gently as their grief subsided to a point where they felt they could move.
Nicole's hand unfurled, revealing the photo she had removed from her mother's hand. The two of them looked at the picture; Nicole, Scott, a boy and two young girls. Nicole's hand drifted to her swollen stomach and she rubbed her bump gently as she leant back into her husband's body.
From his vantage point nearby the Doctor slid to the ground, his own tears running silently down his face. A red headed Scottish girl came and sat next to him.
"I'm sorry," she said gently before resting her head on his shoulder.
Separated by metres, years and lifetimes, the four of them mourned the loss of someone better than they themselves could ever hope to be.
~fin~
A/N : I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry!