Happiness???
Ok, so James moved out on Friday. The night before he went out to the bar and I guess he started shit w. Fatty. He came home and acted like everything was ok. Well sort of. He was being his usual self. Fatty, Miles and Ann got back to the apartment w. the cops! They made him leave. It was awesome. Fatty and Miles changed the locks that night too. James showed up at 5:30 in the morning to get his stuff! Um, hello people are trying to sleep at that time! I was sick that morning. I was fine up until he showed up, which kinda pissed me off. He asked me to help him move! He was so sure that he was going to have his friends help him out. Funny thing is none of them showed! I don't know why, but I helped him pack this shit. We went out to breakfast, then I had to help him move his bed and his dresser! He brought me back to the apartment and he said that he would be back later to come get me since he had to go pick his daughter up from school, then he was going to have dinner w. his mom. Yeah he came back later alright. He came back to get his blanket, then he left and went to the bar. I haven't seen him since! I've talked to him on the phone a couple times and he's been a complete ass! I have to find another place to live and right now I don't have the money to get my own place since I loaned James that $300! He called me a lying bitch the other night and said that he didn't want to talk to me. That's funny cause I'm pretty sure that the other day I'm the one that helped him moved. Not to mention the fact that he fucked me and left. I guess that's just James for you. Pretend to be nice to your face so he can get what he wants then fuck you over in the end! At this point I've just decided to cut my losses and move on! I want nothing more than to have him out of my life. This is going to sound bad, and I know I shouldn't have done it, but at the time I felt like it was the only way I was ever going to feel anything. The night that James called me a lying bitch I cut my self. I hate that I did it. I hate that James made me feel so worthless that I had to do something like that. I look at the cut marks and am reminded of James. The boys that live upstairs (2 of them work w. Fatty) invited me up last night to hang out. I had the best time I've had in a really long time. They're just like my friends in Norman. They are all so cool. They all skate and we all listen to the same kind of music. It was good to finally be around people that I had something in common with. I hung out w. this guy Mike all night. He's really sweet, and cute, and we do at lot of the same stuff! He's really into photography and music and art and I'm really into those things too, so that made me happy. I had a smile on my face the entire night! I actually ended up staying up there last night. The weird thing is Mike is only 18, so he's a year younger than me and I don't usually go for younger guys, but age doesn't matter. He is more mature than James could ever be!