(no subject)
i want everyone is my house to just go to bed.
i need the home to myself.
i need to cry so badly.
this is all bottled up and i'm about to explode.
i hate people asking me questions.
i love the attention, but i don't want to talk about it.
i don't want to tell you i'm jealous because you love her and not me.
because she has so many friends and so much in life ahead of her, and i don't have either of those.
i don't want to tell you that i'm always sad because you are.
because i cant make you happy.
because it doesn;t seem that anything can be done.
who knew that this pain would last so long.
it's been well over a year.
and it doesn't seem like it's going away anytime soon.
i know exactly where to look to make myself upset.
what pictures to see, what lines to read.
one more day.
i always say that, but i really really wish i meant it this time.
just one more time and then i'll be done.
forever.
you cant really make me happy because you wont ever really love me.
as much as i love you....
but if i lose you, who knows how long i will go without having any sort of friend.
even a not-so-real one.
ugh.
i hate my life.
i wish i could just forget everything.
be numb to certain feelings.
i wish you would just go away.
disappear.
hurt me really bad once instead of so many times.
make this real or let me go.
i need the home to myself.
i need to cry so badly.
this is all bottled up and i'm about to explode.
i hate people asking me questions.
i love the attention, but i don't want to talk about it.
i don't want to tell you i'm jealous because you love her and not me.
because she has so many friends and so much in life ahead of her, and i don't have either of those.
i don't want to tell you that i'm always sad because you are.
because i cant make you happy.
because it doesn;t seem that anything can be done.
who knew that this pain would last so long.
it's been well over a year.
and it doesn't seem like it's going away anytime soon.
i know exactly where to look to make myself upset.
what pictures to see, what lines to read.
one more day.
i always say that, but i really really wish i meant it this time.
just one more time and then i'll be done.
forever.
you cant really make me happy because you wont ever really love me.
as much as i love you....
but if i lose you, who knows how long i will go without having any sort of friend.
even a not-so-real one.
ugh.
i hate my life.
i wish i could just forget everything.
be numb to certain feelings.
i wish you would just go away.
disappear.
hurt me really bad once instead of so many times.
make this real or let me go.