let's bypass the bullshit
hmm i dont like to update but i shall do so anyway.
i miss brittany. shes still in bootcamp but she will be out soon and i have only sent her 1 letter and i feel really bad about it. i suck at sending letters and i suck at knowing what to put in them. i tried writing a million times but i have nothing to say. says a whole lot about my life. nice and eventful....but im sure she will understand. ill just tell her she doesnt have to write me cuz im a loser who cant write...:/ but i cant wait to talk to her again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhh!!!! im goin crazy, i think....
so for the past month, i have been alone, without a guy, all by myself, for the first time in 4 years. i wasnt really looking for anyone to fill the vacant space in my heart. it felt good to stretch and be on my own. i met tons of people and made a lot of new friends, some of which will not stop calling but its alllll goooood.
but what i have realized since Ryan has been away from me is that i do not feel comfortable with anyone else but him. he appologized to me (we had a big fight about some bullshit) and we made up and everything and now we are pretty much together again. i really missed him and didnt realize it until we started talking again. i love him so much. damn, how many times have i said that about someone? this time, i am not out of my mind. im thinking clearly, and i truly do love him with all of my heart. leaving is going to be a million times harder now than when i was without him. but if its meant to be, it will be. i have no worries.
speaking of leaving, my leave date for the United States Air Force is February 21, 2006. 4 years of being active government property, 8 years of being government property in general. whoo! no one knows what im talking about....ehh oh well.
im ready to go RIGHT NOW other than the fact that i will miss my family, and friends, and Ryan Daniel Toberman but ill live. ill see everyone again. ill come back to visit. <333333333
no worries!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<3
Jourdan
oh yeah---
i want a new digital camera for christmas....a NICE one. just a thought...hehe!
i miss brittany. shes still in bootcamp but she will be out soon and i have only sent her 1 letter and i feel really bad about it. i suck at sending letters and i suck at knowing what to put in them. i tried writing a million times but i have nothing to say. says a whole lot about my life. nice and eventful....but im sure she will understand. ill just tell her she doesnt have to write me cuz im a loser who cant write...:/ but i cant wait to talk to her again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhh!!!! im goin crazy, i think....
so for the past month, i have been alone, without a guy, all by myself, for the first time in 4 years. i wasnt really looking for anyone to fill the vacant space in my heart. it felt good to stretch and be on my own. i met tons of people and made a lot of new friends, some of which will not stop calling but its alllll goooood.
but what i have realized since Ryan has been away from me is that i do not feel comfortable with anyone else but him. he appologized to me (we had a big fight about some bullshit) and we made up and everything and now we are pretty much together again. i really missed him and didnt realize it until we started talking again. i love him so much. damn, how many times have i said that about someone? this time, i am not out of my mind. im thinking clearly, and i truly do love him with all of my heart. leaving is going to be a million times harder now than when i was without him. but if its meant to be, it will be. i have no worries.
speaking of leaving, my leave date for the United States Air Force is February 21, 2006. 4 years of being active government property, 8 years of being government property in general. whoo! no one knows what im talking about....ehh oh well.
im ready to go RIGHT NOW other than the fact that i will miss my family, and friends, and Ryan Daniel Toberman but ill live. ill see everyone again. ill come back to visit. <333333333
no worries!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<3
Jourdan
oh yeah---
i want a new digital camera for christmas....a NICE one. just a thought...hehe!