easier said then done
u guys talk about how your there for me to talk to. its not so easy. i dont spend all my time thinkin about the bad things those are just the easiest to think about. and im not upset i dont have a b/f i think im better off with out one actually, but its the fact that i just fell left out and like im faling behind, like most the ppl i know from high school are married pregnant or engaged or yes even in jail granted none of those sound too apealing right now i still feel like im left beind, like the world is moving forward and im stcuk in my chilidsh mindset. im like a 12 year old trapped in a 18 year olds body. i sucks. like i still wanna go to the park and play and have slumber parties and run around acting stupid u know all the fun things u did when u were younger, but now i dont get to do so much of that i pretty much only do it when im by myself. most ppl think they are too grown up to do things like that, what is too grown up?? thats something i never wanna be. i mean i love u guys and all but you all are movin on with out me. and i dont want to say hey stop wait for me b/c im not that kind of person. Id do better bottleing up everything but then it explodes when u least expect it and then u end up crying on the shoulder of someone u never thought would see u cry. anyways on a diffrent note i have been missing classes like alot here lately i cant seem to get myself up. i already missed two tests in my theory class. maybe college isint for me :( i mean i do want to grad from college and then be an awsome teacher or singer (in my dreams) i wanna be one of those teachers that ppl look up to not litertally look up to b/c they would have to be realy short kids.:) lol but anyways im gonna rum holla