but maybe misery is what i need to keep my sanity
okay, so I can't believe after almost three years I am writing in this bad boy again...
recently I re-read this whole journal start to finish and realized how much of my own life I'd forgotten, so I think I need to continue recording it all, 'cause it's just so damn exciting...
Okay, quick catch up:
Graduated Oneonta, Enrolled in Beauty School, Single, Unemployed until June 30th
That was easy
Honestly, a lot is different, but some stuff is still the same, right?
Most of the friends I used to write about are long gone, except Jay, Dan, Nick and Jaci. There's a whole new cast of crazies in my life, now, don't worry, you'll meet them all soon enough :-)
One thing I want to make different this time around is that I'd like to record a lot of my dreams in here because I've discovered a unique ability to analyze my dreams, and I find it fascinating.
Here's one that I can not stop thinking about, I had it at a sleepover in Ann's dorm room Saturday Night:
I'm at my camp job taking care of the children in my group. I have made them all t-shirts; decorated with their names, which is a clue to me, because the names of the children are those of from my first year at Ivy League Day Camp. I am taking special care of one boy, named Max ((who bears no resemblance to the Max from my group)). This young boy is spanish and we are playing together for what seems like forever until his mother comes and picks him up, and I'm sad to see him go. I talk to some faceless co-workers, when I decide to sit on a couch and read my e-mails on my phone ((which is actually Gabriella's phone)). As I skim through my e-mails, a male approaches me. In the dream I recognize him as a guy I am close with and am happy to see him coming to sit with me. He takes a seat next to me, peaks at my e-mail and says "Did you get my e-mail?" I tell him no and then decide to read it right there. I open the e-mail and begin to read a love poem he has written me. I know he has written it because the things written are specific about my relationship to him. As I turn to talk to him, he kisses me. I am happy as he slips an arm around me.
Here's the killer, with all the detail, I can not, for the life of me, remember who the guy in the dream is. Maybe he's no one, but I swear, I remember his mouth and nose and jaw. If I saw him walking down the street, I could recognize it.
In my own quick analysis, I think it's just an embodiment of the guy I'd like in my life. And the lack of specifics on him make me feel like I'm not looking for specific qualities in a guy, but I'm more focused on how he makes me feel. Not sure, really...
I just wish I knew who this guy was...
"the way you put your hand on me
the way you talk so easily
the way your lips are glistening
well I'm listening..."
-QuietDrive-
recently I re-read this whole journal start to finish and realized how much of my own life I'd forgotten, so I think I need to continue recording it all, 'cause it's just so damn exciting...
Okay, quick catch up:
Graduated Oneonta, Enrolled in Beauty School, Single, Unemployed until June 30th
That was easy
Honestly, a lot is different, but some stuff is still the same, right?
Most of the friends I used to write about are long gone, except Jay, Dan, Nick and Jaci. There's a whole new cast of crazies in my life, now, don't worry, you'll meet them all soon enough :-)
One thing I want to make different this time around is that I'd like to record a lot of my dreams in here because I've discovered a unique ability to analyze my dreams, and I find it fascinating.
Here's one that I can not stop thinking about, I had it at a sleepover in Ann's dorm room Saturday Night:
I'm at my camp job taking care of the children in my group. I have made them all t-shirts; decorated with their names, which is a clue to me, because the names of the children are those of from my first year at Ivy League Day Camp. I am taking special care of one boy, named Max ((who bears no resemblance to the Max from my group)). This young boy is spanish and we are playing together for what seems like forever until his mother comes and picks him up, and I'm sad to see him go. I talk to some faceless co-workers, when I decide to sit on a couch and read my e-mails on my phone ((which is actually Gabriella's phone)). As I skim through my e-mails, a male approaches me. In the dream I recognize him as a guy I am close with and am happy to see him coming to sit with me. He takes a seat next to me, peaks at my e-mail and says "Did you get my e-mail?" I tell him no and then decide to read it right there. I open the e-mail and begin to read a love poem he has written me. I know he has written it because the things written are specific about my relationship to him. As I turn to talk to him, he kisses me. I am happy as he slips an arm around me.
Here's the killer, with all the detail, I can not, for the life of me, remember who the guy in the dream is. Maybe he's no one, but I swear, I remember his mouth and nose and jaw. If I saw him walking down the street, I could recognize it.
In my own quick analysis, I think it's just an embodiment of the guy I'd like in my life. And the lack of specifics on him make me feel like I'm not looking for specific qualities in a guy, but I'm more focused on how he makes me feel. Not sure, really...
I just wish I knew who this guy was...
"the way you put your hand on me
the way you talk so easily
the way your lips are glistening
well I'm listening..."
-QuietDrive-