LJ Idol season 8, week 30, Scared Money Never Wins
I unwrapped the pretty Christmas paper to reveal a watch. Not a Braille or large print watch, but one made for a fully sighted person. It has blobs of color instead of numbers around the face.
“We knew you couldn’t see it, but all the other kids have them. It’s the craze.” My grandma says from across the room.
It was an awkward moment of my childhood. Was I supposed to say thank you for something I couldn’t use? Did I need to pretend to like it?
I don’t really remember my reaction, just the awkwardness. As a child life with my father’s parents was like this. A series of awkward moments like fragile pieces of glass held together with scotch tape. Anything could break apart at any time. There was no solid ground.
They tended to buy things for my brother and I that we didn’t need, designer clothes, the watch, so many pink things for me when I didn’t like pink. It was like having holidays with strangers.
I felt like instead of love they were giving us money. I don’t know why it was that way. Maybe it started because my dad didn’t want to spend time with his family so we weren’t around them a ton. It probably followed after the divorce when we saw them even less. Their son was a violent alcoholic and drug addict and I feel like they were always trying to compensate for that sad fact.
Over the years they have mellowed more and more. Now they call me to say hello. They still send money or gifts, but they take the time to find out what my tastes are. I’m thirty four and they are getting to know me now. It’s about time. It has allowed me to get to know them too, as people. Their likes and dislikes.
Money never won me over, but love does.
I just got off the phone with them. I teased my grandfather that I ate his favorite for dinner, Chinese food. He hates it. I know that now. We laughed.
My grandmother was preparing to cook dinner. In her eighties she still fixes a big dinner every night. We’re not the same in that way. She was raised to cater to her husband. I was raised to be independent and strong willed. Yet in quiet moments over the phone, from coast to coast of this great continent, we say I love you at the same time. Some things we have in common. Love wins, every time.
“We knew you couldn’t see it, but all the other kids have them. It’s the craze.” My grandma says from across the room.
It was an awkward moment of my childhood. Was I supposed to say thank you for something I couldn’t use? Did I need to pretend to like it?
I don’t really remember my reaction, just the awkwardness. As a child life with my father’s parents was like this. A series of awkward moments like fragile pieces of glass held together with scotch tape. Anything could break apart at any time. There was no solid ground.
They tended to buy things for my brother and I that we didn’t need, designer clothes, the watch, so many pink things for me when I didn’t like pink. It was like having holidays with strangers.
I felt like instead of love they were giving us money. I don’t know why it was that way. Maybe it started because my dad didn’t want to spend time with his family so we weren’t around them a ton. It probably followed after the divorce when we saw them even less. Their son was a violent alcoholic and drug addict and I feel like they were always trying to compensate for that sad fact.
Over the years they have mellowed more and more. Now they call me to say hello. They still send money or gifts, but they take the time to find out what my tastes are. I’m thirty four and they are getting to know me now. It’s about time. It has allowed me to get to know them too, as people. Their likes and dislikes.
Money never won me over, but love does.
I just got off the phone with them. I teased my grandfather that I ate his favorite for dinner, Chinese food. He hates it. I know that now. We laughed.
My grandmother was preparing to cook dinner. In her eighties she still fixes a big dinner every night. We’re not the same in that way. She was raised to cater to her husband. I was raised to be independent and strong willed. Yet in quiet moments over the phone, from coast to coast of this great continent, we say I love you at the same time. Some things we have in common. Love wins, every time.