(no subject)
So the 8th was two months for one of the biggest step I ever took in my life.
And in two days it will be a month since I've been with anyone.
And to tell you the truth? I feel alright. On the eigth I cried because I regret so much and I want to know how you can "love" someone one month and then the next you abandon them. But besides that the pain gets a little less every day. I can look at him with out my heart stopping. I feel almost indifferent anymore. I think I just put back up that wall of non-emotion. And I'm okay with that because by the time that "deteriorates" it wont matter because I'll be okay with what happened. Honestly I hope he's happy with what he's getting right now whether it's time alone or time with Tia. See look. I'm getting better. I didn't even call her "mullety bitch". I hope he got what he wanted. I don't think I'm really even that bitter anymore. I guess it would have happened sooner or later and I'm glad it happened now that in college where my life couldn't affort to go off track and for me to be a mess.
It's better off this way. And if I still cry it's only because I'm still healing and learning to deal with a long relationship break off.
P.S. I'm happy being single now. It's so much easier talking to guys (and my friends for that matter) with out worrying whether "he'll" get mad or not. And it's nice getting to know new people.
So overall I'm okay. :-)
And in two days it will be a month since I've been with anyone.
And to tell you the truth? I feel alright. On the eigth I cried because I regret so much and I want to know how you can "love" someone one month and then the next you abandon them. But besides that the pain gets a little less every day. I can look at him with out my heart stopping. I feel almost indifferent anymore. I think I just put back up that wall of non-emotion. And I'm okay with that because by the time that "deteriorates" it wont matter because I'll be okay with what happened. Honestly I hope he's happy with what he's getting right now whether it's time alone or time with Tia. See look. I'm getting better. I didn't even call her "mullety bitch". I hope he got what he wanted. I don't think I'm really even that bitter anymore. I guess it would have happened sooner or later and I'm glad it happened now that in college where my life couldn't affort to go off track and for me to be a mess.
It's better off this way. And if I still cry it's only because I'm still healing and learning to deal with a long relationship break off.
P.S. I'm happy being single now. It's so much easier talking to guys (and my friends for that matter) with out worrying whether "he'll" get mad or not. And it's nice getting to know new people.
So overall I'm okay. :-)