It's been a long time since I've written in here
And everything has changed. And not much has changed. The more things change, the more they stay the same.
That's so very true, you know. Every damn time you find something that you think is going to make life wonderful... it really doesn't. Not totally. Austin hasn't solved all the world's problems. Even Natalie hasn't solved all the world's problems, and as much as I always try, I still haven't solved all of hers. Just the way life goes though.
What always really pisses me off is the problems that don't need to be there. The problems we cause ourselves. RE-tar-DED. My advice, relax. Know what you know. Know what's for real, and know what's not. Know what you know. If you can just do that, and not always second guess every damn thing in your life, then everything gets much simpler much faster.
Like me. I know that what Natalie and I have is for real. I should let everything else go. I should let all the stuff with Brad go. As long as he's not bothering her, he's not bothering me. And now... now I know that he never really meant any harm... or hasn't for awhile anyway. So that's done.
I know that Natalie and Lauren will be fine. Anything else is just... unreasonable. Only thing needed here is a little communication between friends. Not hard.
I know that life will be great. I know that life is beautiful now. I know that dwelling on what isn't quite right would be stupid. I refuse to be miserable for no good reason.
I know that I have so many people behind me that it's scary. I also know that this life is my own, and that I can do whatever I want with it. I know that I'll never let anyone else live my life for me.
I know what I want. I know I can have it. I know I am happy. I know that all the little things that fall between the cracks don't really matter.
There are two main important things in my life right now that I have control over. My school career, and my love life. These are the most important things in my life, these are what make me happy. These are what I have to take care of. I also know that one is more important than the other, and that I'll take care of that before anything else, like I did this weekend.
I know that everything will be fine. I know there's no reason why it wouldn't be. Good lord... relax. Take a deep breath, look around. Have a cookie. Relax, relax, relax. That's my biggest piece of advice to everyone out there who's in pain.
Doesn't mean that you can let go of everything. Doesn't mean that your life will live itself for you. Just means that you know what you have to do, you know what's really important and what's not, and you need to stop fretting over all the little bs and look at the big things. And, ultimately, relax. I don't know one person who can't handle what they have to take care of right now. I DO know a lot of people who put WAY too much stress on themselves.
I'm going to go relax now. My school life will be fine, because I'm more than capable and quite dedicated. My love life, my life with Natalie, I will always work very hard to take care of. Working hard to take care of that IS relaxing. Life is good. That's the bottom line here.
And if you can't say that, then look around, take a deep breath, go get that cookie, and try a little harder. Life is good. At least, at least, life could be much worse.
That's so very true, you know. Every damn time you find something that you think is going to make life wonderful... it really doesn't. Not totally. Austin hasn't solved all the world's problems. Even Natalie hasn't solved all the world's problems, and as much as I always try, I still haven't solved all of hers. Just the way life goes though.
What always really pisses me off is the problems that don't need to be there. The problems we cause ourselves. RE-tar-DED. My advice, relax. Know what you know. Know what's for real, and know what's not. Know what you know. If you can just do that, and not always second guess every damn thing in your life, then everything gets much simpler much faster.
Like me. I know that what Natalie and I have is for real. I should let everything else go. I should let all the stuff with Brad go. As long as he's not bothering her, he's not bothering me. And now... now I know that he never really meant any harm... or hasn't for awhile anyway. So that's done.
I know that Natalie and Lauren will be fine. Anything else is just... unreasonable. Only thing needed here is a little communication between friends. Not hard.
I know that life will be great. I know that life is beautiful now. I know that dwelling on what isn't quite right would be stupid. I refuse to be miserable for no good reason.
I know that I have so many people behind me that it's scary. I also know that this life is my own, and that I can do whatever I want with it. I know that I'll never let anyone else live my life for me.
I know what I want. I know I can have it. I know I am happy. I know that all the little things that fall between the cracks don't really matter.
There are two main important things in my life right now that I have control over. My school career, and my love life. These are the most important things in my life, these are what make me happy. These are what I have to take care of. I also know that one is more important than the other, and that I'll take care of that before anything else, like I did this weekend.
I know that everything will be fine. I know there's no reason why it wouldn't be. Good lord... relax. Take a deep breath, look around. Have a cookie. Relax, relax, relax. That's my biggest piece of advice to everyone out there who's in pain.
Doesn't mean that you can let go of everything. Doesn't mean that your life will live itself for you. Just means that you know what you have to do, you know what's really important and what's not, and you need to stop fretting over all the little bs and look at the big things. And, ultimately, relax. I don't know one person who can't handle what they have to take care of right now. I DO know a lot of people who put WAY too much stress on themselves.
I'm going to go relax now. My school life will be fine, because I'm more than capable and quite dedicated. My love life, my life with Natalie, I will always work very hard to take care of. Working hard to take care of that IS relaxing. Life is good. That's the bottom line here.
And if you can't say that, then look around, take a deep breath, go get that cookie, and try a little harder. Life is good. At least, at least, life could be much worse.