i am sitting in lina's room.

[im_mandy_lou]

i just got back from a "date" maybe an hour ago. lina and i were discussing dates and what they are, who they are with, blah blah blah.. i dont really know what a date is or how it should go. i think ive been on maybe 3 dates where i actually knew they were dates and i actually had some interest in the guy. i dont really know if thats just what everyone considers a date: you and the other person have a general like or interest in eachother so you want to hang out. who knows really. or is it just the person that asks you to hang out has this interest in you so they consider it a date and you dont have any interest, more than friends, so you just consider it two friends hanging out. so i guess what im saying is that in my point of view ive only been on a handful of dates. but im not an expert at dates or dating. so on the first date what is it like, what should it be like? do you flirt constantly and just smile like you are totally into the person? do you hold hands? does either one of you say "this is a date"? really, what happens? this might just sound silly to anyone that reads this, but honestly, just for once i want to go on a date and know that it really is a date.

i kind of just think that dating is silly anyway. no one really wants to date, i dont think. but honestly you cant just jump into a relationship with someone. so what do you do? i think just hang out, have a good time, no pressure. if it ends up being that you want something more with this person, then go for it. but honestly, you really shouldnt just expect things to work. dont think that just because you are attracted to someone and you tell them that you are really into them, means that they are going to feel the same way back. and especially dont expect that after hanging out with someone maybe 5 times over the course of months. what is really expected in dating? im not so sure on it.

i think thats enough for now. i dont know if any of it makes sense but it does to me i guess.
goodnight.