Yeah Yeah Yeah...again again again
Yeah, again I'm leaving a warning. I don't know who it is that reads this, and I don't really care either. If you don't like my bitching then get over it and leave. This is here for me and me only, so go away and get over yourself if you have a problem with it.
I don't know. Josh and I have been better lately i guess. better, but not good. I'm having a real problem right now. I have alot ging on and I havent gotten to spend alot of out-of-school time with him and I miss him. I miss him so much. Dad asks wwhy I don't want to have him over to my house. Easy. because I'm not allowed to even cuddle with him when I'm at my house. That's all I really want is to be held, and even that is forbidden at my house. At his house we can cuddle and watch movies and just talk, but at mine we're always being watched so it's hard to even talk sometimes without my father breathing down my neck. My withdrawal syndrome as I've come to know it is taking it's toll. I'm a bitch. I'm grumpy, I guess. I dont know how else to describe it. and I get to where I don't feel like eating or drinking or talking or doing anything really. It worries him and he starts a whole cycle too because he doesnt really know what he can do about it. There really isnt anything he can do about it. I can't even describe how he makes me feel when we're alone. I'm always happy when I'm with him. I just like to be held. By Him. not really anyone else. I don't really like to be touched by anyone else..let alone held. I don't know. doesnt help that I'm waaaaay stressed about AP/IB exams and I don't really like it. I hate that teachers always think that their SPANISH class is the most important class ever...whoops the spanish part just slipped out. Did I say that out loud?? well, whatever. Screw spanish..i really hate that class this year. Like in a serious way. Hate it. Whatever. It's not like I've done homework for that class in weeks anyways. Ahh, typical senioritis. oh well deall with it. I've been working my ass off all fricken year so I can slack off alittle in the last 2 months I think. I think everyone can just deall with it, because im gonna slack as much as I fricken want because im not even close to failing anything except english so screw everyone..I'm not going to have the middle-of-june-stress-out liike i have every other year of High school. Not this year. I'm going to Enjoy my last month of HIgh School. Oh, and screw english. I gave up last friday in english because the whole class is just BS. Total fricken BS.
I'm drained..
I'm Out.