Sorry, but that four years thing is BS. Has your doctor experienced a similar loss? Then tell her/him to shut up. Textbooks don't apply to grief.
A state of acceptance does not mean you stop grieving - it just means that you come to accept that this is your life. You're life without your baby. It's not the way you wanted it but it's still your life. You still have things to live for, your husband, your family, your friends, your future children.
You won't feel the pain as accutely as you do now in time. The first couple months were the hardest for me and my husband. My daughter Persephone died just 6 months ago and already I feel differently then I did. I still miss her every day, but I don't cry every day. Through my support group I have met a lot of parents who are going through this. Some loss their children 5+ even 10+ years ago. They have acceptance but they still grieve. It will never be okay with me that my daughter died, but I now have a sence that I will be okay. That I can move forward in the world and take the memory of her with me every step of the way.
I hope you and your husband can take care of each other the best you can. Be gentle and remember that everyone grieves differently and accept that about each other.
A state of acceptance does not mean you stop grieving - it just means that you come to accept that this is your life. You're life without your baby. It's not the way you wanted it but it's still your life. You still have things to live for, your husband, your family, your friends, your future children.
You won't feel the pain as accutely as you do now in time. The first couple months were the hardest for me and my husband. My daughter Persephone died just 6 months ago and already I feel differently then I did. I still miss her every day, but I don't cry every day. Through my support group I have met a lot of parents who are going through this. Some loss their children 5+ even 10+ years ago. They have acceptance but they still grieve. It will never be okay with me that my daughter died, but I now have a sence that I will be okay. That I can move forward in the world and take the memory of her with me every step of the way.
I hope you and your husband can take care of each other the best you can. Be gentle and remember that everyone grieves differently and accept that about each other.
(((Hugs)))
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