004 ≈ day, close to evening ≈ video

[windheir]

[The video starts up after making sure to filter it from his planned victim and shows one very excited John Egbert peering into the video, a mischievous smile showing.]

Hey guys! You're just in time to witness THE pranking master in action! So just sit tight and learn, heheh.

[The PORTAL is put down for a moment, being sure to be hidden out of sight

Comments

[ironicswag]

[ This can't be happening. It was like John had decided to dump one of his worst nightmares on him out of the blue, when he least expected it. He felt trapped, physically from the smuppets and mentally from trying to figure out how he's going to talk himself out of this.

It's kinda hard to keep your cool when you're stuck under a pile of smuppet dung.

Fuck you, Egbert. Just, fuck you. ]

..............

[ He doesn't even say anything at the moment, trying to figure out if he should contact Rose in some way about this, because proboscalypse number two just hit. Nah, that'd be stupid. ]

[windheir]

[Look Dave, John here is going to help you out now that his deed is as good as done. He's carefully plucking one smuppet from his bro's view, man these things are reaaaalllyy weeeird.

He's just floating there though, flashing a silly smile.]

Are you planning on coming out anytime soon?

[ironicswag]

Nah.

[ Keep calm, stay cool. ]

I'll stay for a little while longer. Best motherfucking day of my life.

[windheir]

Pffftt, what? Come on I just dumped a gigantic pile of these things on you, I mean I DID see the look on your face which really knocked up my gambit dude but you can't go and enjoy a prank after!

[Crossing legs in midair, propping elbows on knees to set his chin in open palms.]

Man you really like these things huh?

[ironicswag]

[ No. He has butt ass sticking at the side of his cheek, not at all.

So close to flying off the handle now. SO CLOSE.

But no he can't do that, John is here. ]

Yup. It's like puppet heaven [ hell ] in here, wouldn't change a fucking thing.

[windheir]

Gross! Whatever you say then.

[That smuppet he took away earlier? Just gonna put it right back in your face.]

[ironicswag]

[ HOLY FUCK EGBERT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--

Great. Another piece of cock rubbing against his face. Don't fly off the handle Dave, John is watching. Just say something cool... ]

Yeah, okay bro.

[ UGHHHFSDKJLFSDF;LK. And this is when he's probably proceeding to talk to Rose about this, typing under that pile of fucking horny kermit dolls and using it as a security blanket. A horrifying security blanket. ]

[windheir]

[Also texting Rose! After a few minutes though he'll chirp up.]

Hey Dave? You're not in a coma are you?

[ironicswag]

[ .....

.........

.....................

After much consideration, he doesn't answer. ]

[windheir]

[...............]

Uhhh.

... Dave?

[ironicswag]

[ NOT ANSWERING. NOPE. ]

[windheir]

....

Dude this isn't funny!!

[ironicswag]

[ Yeah. It kinda is. ]

[windheir]

[You know what? Fine. You wanna be like that? Arms begin to glow before one hand is lifted and whoosh! Up you and the pile of smuppets are being lifted in the air!]

[ironicswag]

[ asfdjkl;kj. SMUPPETS ARE RUBBING AGAINST HIM AGAIN.

No, keep your cool Dave, it's just some windy thing. But you should really say something now. ]

Whoa, someone sure likes to interrupt my beauty sleep.

[windheir]

Sleeping Beauty has to get up at some point anyway, any quieter and I would think the puppets had killed you!

What am I suppose to put on your gravestone, Dave? "Rest in peace Dave Strider, the guy who was brought to death by puppets. Wow that is a pretty stupid way to die." Pretty sure everyone would be torn between feeling sad for you or laughing. Heheheh.

[You can totally hear the air quotes on that sentence, speaking of air he's gonna flip the whole pile and Dave upside down.]