(no subject)

[iloveyouiraq]

A year ago today marks when things changed. I guess things change daily, but CHANGED. I'm happy because I don't feel regretful today or even sad. I feel like I've grown a lot in the past year. I've been taken advantage of and taken for granted but I'm okay with this. I realize now for a fact that we can't control others- only ourselves. We can't control how others feel towards us, we can't control the happiness of others. I think it's for the best that it's this way. If there were some sort of magic wand available to us in order to keep a person (be it a partner or a friend) in my life I wouldn't want it. If someone doesn't want to hang around then that's fine- I want to use all of my heart in order to love the people who want to be in my world no matter what. This may seem obvious to some but this isn't something that I've been consciously aware of for very long. I have to admit that I've spent large amounts of my precious time compromising my standards, accepting less than what I know that I deserve, and pretending to be okay with this in order to keep someone in my life who doesn't seem to care very much about being there. This doesn't result in happiness. I've realized that when I ceased to make excuses for some people they simply ceased to exist at all in my life. I'm happy because I'm not sad about this sort of thing anymore. It's liberating, honestly. I mean I'm not giving up on anyone in the world but at the same time I'm never again investing any part of my heart into anyone who isn't going to take care of it. I'm happy :). I'm a stronger and more "Experienced" person than those who have treated me badly and have been dishonest with me because I know not to treat people like that. I know that life is for learning and growing and so it's my sincere hope that everyone, even/particularly those who have wronged me, find love. First with themselves.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the universe, deserve your love and affection."