(no subject)

[ilovethefall]

i love my cat.
he knows how to make me happy

i don't know what i want with life.
i have one summer to figure it out

i am falling in love with a boy
his name is TJ
he makes me very happy
but he lives so far away
but i don't care
when we get to be together we paint or draw each other pictures to keep in our absence
we read "extremely loud and incredibly close" outloud together
we lay in the grass
fall asleep in the sun
we make pancakes and sing each other songs
we talk of depressing philosophies and depressed philosophers,
we love each other like dandilions cause we are too scared to say i love you just yet
we are silent,
and we never stop talking,
he makes me happy. more than that he makes me feel...

i miss hanging out with my sister.
everytime she says she'll hang out she makes other plans.
that's frustrating
but i love her
i just miss her

and when i'm all alone and the boy is far and jess is busy,
i have cat
and he knows how to make me happy and to love me.
lately:
i pulled a muscle in my left leg and am on crutches
i ate thai food tonight
i saw a lot of beautiful, sad, things that made me feel so much i couldn't help but cry
(that is in a good way)
i called all the moms in my families
i struggled walking through a grocery store
i was started at often
i was cared for by a stranger
i was entirely alone
i stil don't know what i want with my life
i still haven't done my taxes
i still haven't studied my spanish
i hurt a friend on accident
i appologized and he held me
i called TJ
i cried
i smiled
i felt
i'm going to bed and will get up and study
maybe
goodnight friends