No subject...
I need a consult. By consult I mean I need someone to smack me in the face and tell me I'm being ridiculous.
Austin and I don't talk on the phone for hours and immediately afterward head for bed. We used to do that every night, and I liked it. It was like those intimate moments where old couples simply spend time together, not really talking about anything in particular, and sometimes just being silent, and then turning in for sleep. They would both be reading or something, and then some sort of question or comment would fly through one of their minds, they'd say it, and bam, discussion. We used to do that, but we don't do that anymore.
Austin claims it's because we already know so much about each other that we don't really have much to talk about besides how our days went, or the occasional philosophical discussion. I feel differently, especially seeing as I don't know much about his medical history (I know a few things, but there might be something I don't know, right?), and he doesn't know much about mine.
It's not that I feel like he doesn't love me anymore, because I don't feel that way. It's not that I feel like we're growing farther apart, because I don't feel that way either. I've already explained why I don't feel like we've run out of things to talk about.
He likes to have his alone time. In all seriousness this does not mean masturbation, so don't go there. He'll claim that he needs to wind down, or that he feels like playing video games. It's been like this for the past two weeks, perhaps more. It bothers me that he can't make me the last thing of the day, and it also bothers me that the length for which we talk isn't as long as it has been in the past. We used to talk for hours, now it's minutes. The last couple of days he's called me sometime during the afternoon to talk for awhile, today it even extended as long as an hour. Logically these things should be cumulative, but emotions can be illogical...or at least mine can be. The time we talk doesn't feel cumulative for me. I can't add an hour in the early afternoon to an hour at 10:30 and expect to be content because we've had a total of two hours of phone conversation during that day. Honestly I'd rather he did whatever he wanted to do late at night during that time in the early afternoon so that we could have our total two hours in one sitting.
Anyway, I just want things to go back to the way they were. I'm sure I'll grow to be content with the way they are now, but if they could go back to the way they were I know I would be happier.
So, let the beating commence.
Austin and I don't talk on the phone for hours and immediately afterward head for bed. We used to do that every night, and I liked it. It was like those intimate moments where old couples simply spend time together, not really talking about anything in particular, and sometimes just being silent, and then turning in for sleep. They would both be reading or something, and then some sort of question or comment would fly through one of their minds, they'd say it, and bam, discussion. We used to do that, but we don't do that anymore.
Austin claims it's because we already know so much about each other that we don't really have much to talk about besides how our days went, or the occasional philosophical discussion. I feel differently, especially seeing as I don't know much about his medical history (I know a few things, but there might be something I don't know, right?), and he doesn't know much about mine.
It's not that I feel like he doesn't love me anymore, because I don't feel that way. It's not that I feel like we're growing farther apart, because I don't feel that way either. I've already explained why I don't feel like we've run out of things to talk about.
He likes to have his alone time. In all seriousness this does not mean masturbation, so don't go there. He'll claim that he needs to wind down, or that he feels like playing video games. It's been like this for the past two weeks, perhaps more. It bothers me that he can't make me the last thing of the day, and it also bothers me that the length for which we talk isn't as long as it has been in the past. We used to talk for hours, now it's minutes. The last couple of days he's called me sometime during the afternoon to talk for awhile, today it even extended as long as an hour. Logically these things should be cumulative, but emotions can be illogical...or at least mine can be. The time we talk doesn't feel cumulative for me. I can't add an hour in the early afternoon to an hour at 10:30 and expect to be content because we've had a total of two hours of phone conversation during that day. Honestly I'd rather he did whatever he wanted to do late at night during that time in the early afternoon so that we could have our total two hours in one sitting.
Anyway, I just want things to go back to the way they were. I'm sure I'll grow to be content with the way they are now, but if they could go back to the way they were I know I would be happier.
So, let the beating commence.