I am completely shattered.
I woke up to an empty inbox. Gone were the things which mattered and still do. You probably have no idea how much i cherished those messages. Neither did i until i came to lose it. Traces of friendship, wishes, love, care, encouragement, old jokes that only a few could understand. (Like me wearing camel on the grand piano and drunkard days) I need to keep reading them to keep myself sane. Sometimes before i sleep, i'd frequent those texts to refresh certain memories. And sadly, those texts are the only things i have left of them. Perhaps there are some things that i should and alr have let go. But some people and events i am not ready to lose. I am afraid. Afraid that one day there will be no reminiscence of my teenage years. Im tired at the thought of making new memories. I want to hold on to what i alr have and build upon them, not make something out of nothing.
In my mind i frantically searched all the way back to the last message of my inbox. I remember a text from Jolene saying she just came back from Nippon and she misses me but she wants to go back. A text from louise saying that i was damn retarded. Texts from J to encourage me to hold on. Texts from A who acknowledged and cherished my existence. Message from Jolene that says something like "Nahbey im supposed to be at your house now". Texts from jean about funny jokes (one room flats and big mansion) And those which carried birthday, christmas, new year wishes from my lovely friends. Messages from certain boys, four to be exact, some who means nothing to me, but others who still hold a place in my heart. Texts from my parents :) etc. You see, im trying very hard to revive things that happened as long as 2 years ago.
Its practically a record of my presence, those who really makes my day and makes living worthwhile, and what i've been through. Now you see how much it meant to me. How i get extremely paranoid of losing my phone, cus its not a phone i'll lose, but a part of me.
I pray, hard, that i'll be able to retrieve them tml. And damn you samsung.
In my mind i frantically searched all the way back to the last message of my inbox. I remember a text from Jolene saying she just came back from Nippon and she misses me but she wants to go back. A text from louise saying that i was damn retarded. Texts from J to encourage me to hold on. Texts from A who acknowledged and cherished my existence. Message from Jolene that says something like "Nahbey im supposed to be at your house now". Texts from jean about funny jokes (one room flats and big mansion) And those which carried birthday, christmas, new year wishes from my lovely friends. Messages from certain boys, four to be exact, some who means nothing to me, but others who still hold a place in my heart. Texts from my parents :) etc. You see, im trying very hard to revive things that happened as long as 2 years ago.
Its practically a record of my presence, those who really makes my day and makes living worthwhile, and what i've been through. Now you see how much it meant to me. How i get extremely paranoid of losing my phone, cus its not a phone i'll lose, but a part of me.
I pray, hard, that i'll be able to retrieve them tml. And damn you samsung.