(no subject)
listen now, i really do have an appreciation for people.
this semester has been a crazy one. its gone by way to fast and yet all the same i dont really remember any of it. seems like just yesturday i was complaining about sing practice...now im complaining about not having anything to do because its about to be thanksgiving break. woa. slow down. its true 2009 is only 3 years away. stop...just stop.
i'm in the process of reading blue like jazz. despite the fact that it seems to be the new craze to read around here a good friend of mine last year introduced it to me. if i could be anything close to writing a critical review over it, id say its actually quite good. in all reality its a nonreligious book about real christianity or to take off the title...real life walking with Jesus.
to be honest, ive gotten really cynical lately. i think the root of this cynicism is derived from this book. because miller is really sarcastic in his writing. but besides that, he really points out the true things of life. how christianity looks towards non believers or even christians who are just annoyed.
i hate that going to this school means knowing and loving everyone without actually knowing people. its about numbers and thats it. not realy community. i hate that. with a passion. i hate that we have to pretend to be nice and pretend to make friends when in reality they piss me off. they make me so mad but i throw on this smile and everything is ok. i know that we fight emotions non stop. i say i am not mad but on the inside im beating myself up because my feelings really did get hurt. but, ive come to one conclusion.
in this book miller states (in lamens terms cuz i dont remember the exact wording) that the worst thing the devil can do to us, is not make us sin, but allow us to waste time. and its so true. i am wasting my time, with worthless fights, costless conversations. im not using myself to the full advantage that the Lord created me to do and i hate that i dont remember hardly anything about this semester except the bad stuff. the stuff that hurt my feelings. the stuff that i didnt like. a lot of stuff that was about me.
basically i suck. but God's grace is more sufficient than anything i can comprehend.
in ending this rant ive decided that next semester i am going to try and waste less time. be freinds with people because i love them, Jesus loves them, and allow it to be REAL. having meaningful conversations instead of worrying about stuff that affects me.
i mean who really cares.
im about to go get some subway and im pretty excited about it. i dont have work and i get to go home tomorrow. then its back to atown for a week of classes then finals and then hanging out till about the 20th. i cant wait. just thought id give a run down of my life because it will probably be awhile till we meet again my lovely LJ.
peace be with you.
this semester has been a crazy one. its gone by way to fast and yet all the same i dont really remember any of it. seems like just yesturday i was complaining about sing practice...now im complaining about not having anything to do because its about to be thanksgiving break. woa. slow down. its true 2009 is only 3 years away. stop...just stop.
i'm in the process of reading blue like jazz. despite the fact that it seems to be the new craze to read around here a good friend of mine last year introduced it to me. if i could be anything close to writing a critical review over it, id say its actually quite good. in all reality its a nonreligious book about real christianity or to take off the title...real life walking with Jesus.
to be honest, ive gotten really cynical lately. i think the root of this cynicism is derived from this book. because miller is really sarcastic in his writing. but besides that, he really points out the true things of life. how christianity looks towards non believers or even christians who are just annoyed.
i hate that going to this school means knowing and loving everyone without actually knowing people. its about numbers and thats it. not realy community. i hate that. with a passion. i hate that we have to pretend to be nice and pretend to make friends when in reality they piss me off. they make me so mad but i throw on this smile and everything is ok. i know that we fight emotions non stop. i say i am not mad but on the inside im beating myself up because my feelings really did get hurt. but, ive come to one conclusion.
in this book miller states (in lamens terms cuz i dont remember the exact wording) that the worst thing the devil can do to us, is not make us sin, but allow us to waste time. and its so true. i am wasting my time, with worthless fights, costless conversations. im not using myself to the full advantage that the Lord created me to do and i hate that i dont remember hardly anything about this semester except the bad stuff. the stuff that hurt my feelings. the stuff that i didnt like. a lot of stuff that was about me.
basically i suck. but God's grace is more sufficient than anything i can comprehend.
in ending this rant ive decided that next semester i am going to try and waste less time. be freinds with people because i love them, Jesus loves them, and allow it to be REAL. having meaningful conversations instead of worrying about stuff that affects me.
i mean who really cares.
im about to go get some subway and im pretty excited about it. i dont have work and i get to go home tomorrow. then its back to atown for a week of classes then finals and then hanging out till about the 20th. i cant wait. just thought id give a run down of my life because it will probably be awhile till we meet again my lovely LJ.
peace be with you.