We were so high...we just needed to come down...
For me, the best time to think about things is when I'm walking alone. Like when I was living in Bergenfield, I often walk home at night and just get all my thoughts laid out. To be honest...I miss that a lot. Late at night I'll smoke and think...but it just isn't the same.
So now whenever you see me write a nice long blog, you'll realize that I've been doing a lot of thinking. Although this time I don't know if I have reached a conclusion. So this could just be a bunch of ramble
bullshit.
Last night when I was talking to Justine on the phone, we realized how much we missed being kids. Now both her and I being 17 legally means we aren't adults yet. But everyone knows that age is just a number. So it seriously sucks so much. So I have concluded that I wish I could just be 15 again.
Now not that 15 was a great year for me or anything. There really wasn't that much that was so great. It was the last year that I lived in Bergenfield though. But anyways, it was an age where you're getting older and growing more mature, but you're still allowed to have your childish moments.
Next summer...well technically this summer, I will be moving out and moving back to Jersey and probably move in with Gavin. Now that's a really big deal. It's not going to be just an average teenage boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. It will be me and him living
together, working to try to afford our life. I know it's going to be really hard. But you have to start somewhere.
I need to be more responsible anyways. I'll be in college and not living with my parents. It's a great thought to think about...I just hope the reality of it all is just as great. I mean I'm not doubting that it won't be amazing, I just hope it's just not too hard.
It's hard to be in a distance relationship. I don't know anyone else that understands what I'm going through. The only person that can relate to me is Gavin. He's getting used to this though. I know what
distance relationships are like and I can handle them. He thought it wouldn't be that hard, but no he realizes how wrong he is.
After being with him everyday for 2 months and then not seeing him at all, it really does some damage. We do fight. But we are happy. We're happy being with each other and the fights don't change that. So I guess things right now are just good between us. The summer was amazing..but right now things are just good. And I can deal with that.
I don't know yet if I'll be coming in October. I'm going to sit down the mom tonight and have a serious dicussion and find out what I need to do. Sometimes I can bargain with her to get what I want. But now she's complaining that I always get what I want and she isn't going to do it anymore. We'll see.
I'm really hoping to get this job in preschool. I have an Early Childhood Conference next week, so I'm going to try to show off my skill. Try to learn a lot as well cause I need all of this information.
I know I will be going to New Jersey in March for definate. So when I go then I'm going to try to find a preschool that will hire me over the summer and that will continue to employ me during next year.
I'm hoping that this year goes by as fast as last. I hope all of my friends stay friends. College changes people and changes friends. So who knows what will be when I go back. Justine won't be there and that
will be weird enough.
I'm in first period right now. I have geometry next which I'm not looking forward to. I hate math. Then I believe I'm going to subway for lunch. I'm looking forward to a meatball sub. I do miss blimpies
though. And I would so much rather a slice of Jersey pizza or a taylor ham sandwich.
The week has gone by kind of fast because I didn't have school on Monday. Some announcement is going on so I can barely concentrate. Well whatever the bell is going to ring soon so I'm just going to end this. I know I don't write blogs very often...but not many people read
them anyways. So then if I get more feedback you get more Caroline ramblings.
Lend Me.
<3
Baby I love you.
So now whenever you see me write a nice long blog, you'll realize that I've been doing a lot of thinking. Although this time I don't know if I have reached a conclusion. So this could just be a bunch of ramble
bullshit.
Last night when I was talking to Justine on the phone, we realized how much we missed being kids. Now both her and I being 17 legally means we aren't adults yet. But everyone knows that age is just a number. So it seriously sucks so much. So I have concluded that I wish I could just be 15 again.
Now not that 15 was a great year for me or anything. There really wasn't that much that was so great. It was the last year that I lived in Bergenfield though. But anyways, it was an age where you're getting older and growing more mature, but you're still allowed to have your childish moments.
Next summer...well technically this summer, I will be moving out and moving back to Jersey and probably move in with Gavin. Now that's a really big deal. It's not going to be just an average teenage boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. It will be me and him living
together, working to try to afford our life. I know it's going to be really hard. But you have to start somewhere.
I need to be more responsible anyways. I'll be in college and not living with my parents. It's a great thought to think about...I just hope the reality of it all is just as great. I mean I'm not doubting that it won't be amazing, I just hope it's just not too hard.
It's hard to be in a distance relationship. I don't know anyone else that understands what I'm going through. The only person that can relate to me is Gavin. He's getting used to this though. I know what
distance relationships are like and I can handle them. He thought it wouldn't be that hard, but no he realizes how wrong he is.
After being with him everyday for 2 months and then not seeing him at all, it really does some damage. We do fight. But we are happy. We're happy being with each other and the fights don't change that. So I guess things right now are just good between us. The summer was amazing..but right now things are just good. And I can deal with that.
I don't know yet if I'll be coming in October. I'm going to sit down the mom tonight and have a serious dicussion and find out what I need to do. Sometimes I can bargain with her to get what I want. But now she's complaining that I always get what I want and she isn't going to do it anymore. We'll see.
I'm really hoping to get this job in preschool. I have an Early Childhood Conference next week, so I'm going to try to show off my skill. Try to learn a lot as well cause I need all of this information.
I know I will be going to New Jersey in March for definate. So when I go then I'm going to try to find a preschool that will hire me over the summer and that will continue to employ me during next year.
I'm hoping that this year goes by as fast as last. I hope all of my friends stay friends. College changes people and changes friends. So who knows what will be when I go back. Justine won't be there and that
will be weird enough.
I'm in first period right now. I have geometry next which I'm not looking forward to. I hate math. Then I believe I'm going to subway for lunch. I'm looking forward to a meatball sub. I do miss blimpies
though. And I would so much rather a slice of Jersey pizza or a taylor ham sandwich.
The week has gone by kind of fast because I didn't have school on Monday. Some announcement is going on so I can barely concentrate. Well whatever the bell is going to ring soon so I'm just going to end this. I know I don't write blogs very often...but not many people read
them anyways. So then if I get more feedback you get more Caroline ramblings.
Lend Me.
<3
Baby I love you.