"As if you're the one to talk, trying to take what you don't have...
Whatever made you so jealous? I'm tired of being quiet, I'm sick of writing the songs that make you think that you're so special, you never really were that special..."
When I was about... maybe 4 or 5 I stopped believing in Santa, the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy etc... Freshman year I gave up on public opinion, first thing that I realized was top 40 music, wasn't really the top 40, and I fell for a better genre. Sophmore year I realized I didn't really believe in any form of God. I didn't just stop believing, I just realized part of me never did. Junior year's big let down was Fate. I let go of the idea that things were supposed to happen a certain way at a certain time. Senior year I tossed any plans of college out the window and realized I wanted a different approach.
Last fall my view on public opinion was re-instated when Dubya won again... Shortly after, with alot of thinking I let go of one of my strongest beliefs.. Love. In this past winter I've given up on love, the idea of love, and the fact that there is such a thing that could keep people together other than convenience or determination... But today I gave up on the one remaining thing I've held on to, for so long. I've given up on 'hope'. Hope is the opposite of worry. Worrying does nothing for you, as my senior quote said "Worrying is alot like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere" (from Van Wilder). Hope is the mirror image of it. Hoping things to get better is a fucking facade. Wishing, praying, falling in love. they are all built around hope. Hope that things work out, hope that things stay the same, hoping that things get better.
For 20 fucking years I've hoped. I've prayed. I've fallen prey to the mirage of Love. I've believed. Good joke life... I'll bend over for you so you can pin the tail on the ASS now...
Adam
When I was about... maybe 4 or 5 I stopped believing in Santa, the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy etc... Freshman year I gave up on public opinion, first thing that I realized was top 40 music, wasn't really the top 40, and I fell for a better genre. Sophmore year I realized I didn't really believe in any form of God. I didn't just stop believing, I just realized part of me never did. Junior year's big let down was Fate. I let go of the idea that things were supposed to happen a certain way at a certain time. Senior year I tossed any plans of college out the window and realized I wanted a different approach.
Last fall my view on public opinion was re-instated when Dubya won again... Shortly after, with alot of thinking I let go of one of my strongest beliefs.. Love. In this past winter I've given up on love, the idea of love, and the fact that there is such a thing that could keep people together other than convenience or determination... But today I gave up on the one remaining thing I've held on to, for so long. I've given up on 'hope'. Hope is the opposite of worry. Worrying does nothing for you, as my senior quote said "Worrying is alot like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere" (from Van Wilder). Hope is the mirror image of it. Hoping things to get better is a fucking facade. Wishing, praying, falling in love. they are all built around hope. Hope that things work out, hope that things stay the same, hoping that things get better.
For 20 fucking years I've hoped. I've prayed. I've fallen prey to the mirage of Love. I've believed. Good joke life... I'll bend over for you so you can pin the tail on the ASS now...
Adam