The Giuoco Piano Affair (Act I)...
On to the next episode in Season 1, The Giuoco Piano Affair. This ep sees the return of two of our boys' most ruthless villains, Gervaise Ravel and Harold Bufferton. Though perhaps Bufferton is merely the lapdog of ruthless villainess Gervaise. At any rate, there's lots of action, some sparkling dialogue, and one of the most entertaining scenes, imo, in the first season. But to find out of which I speak, you must join me...
1
We join Mr. Waverly in his Season 1 bare essentials office, briefing Napoleon on his new mission, and the subsequent death of the agent to whom it was previously assigned.
2
The recorded voice of the deceased agent tells of finding a yacht in a port near the resort town of Baridqua. A yacht which was once known as the Biella, now renamed the Haggarel. "This," states Mr. Waverly, "is where he first got on their trail."
3
4
The agent's voice continues. "Baridqua itself is about as far from the rest of the world as you could want, and the house is even harder to get to. Quite inaccessible."
5
6
"He was a good man," Mr. Waverly eulogizes. "A bit too sure of himself. Reminds me of you in some ways." Which gets a definite non-verbal response from the Brunet.
7
A reaction which Napoleon rapidly turns into a grin.
8
9
He and Mr. Waverly then listen to the rest of the recorded communication, in which the agent relays the prelude to his own death, as a helicopter makes a run at him, firing a rocket which causes a landslide, burying the hapless agent.
10
"There it is," concludes Mr. Waverly. "They found his body on a mountain ledge. The house was deserted. They didn't even pick up their clothes." "Now how far could the yacht get before his report was followed up?" asks Napoleon. "Precisely the point," responds Waverly. "In open water, they'd have been seen."
11
12
13
"Well, there must be a thousand inlets and coves and harbors along that stretch of coast." "Yes, and that yacht has gone aground in one of them," Mr. Waverly states. Napoleon replies, "The problem is, how to get them to come out?"
14
Waverly fairly snaps, "I'm not looking for a problem, Mr. Solo. I'm looking for a solution." "Well, they know me. If I were to show up in the area, they'd try and kill me. Would that help anything?"
15
"Only Mr. Kuryakin," Number 1 Section 1 replies. At Napoleon's quizzical look, he furthers, "Who is next in line for promotion."
16
17
Napoleon manages an amused smirk at the comment.
18
"What have we got that they may want? Anything they can take home?" Waverly questions. "Just to show you where their home is, of course." Napoleon bites his lip as he ponders this conundrum.
19
20
"As a matter of fact, we do have something along those lines. Something they'd recognize, and undoubtedly try to pick up, because they could use it as bait to trap me." "What is this object?" Mr. Waverly inquires.
21
22
"Not a what, sir, rather, a who.
23
24
"And Mr. Kuryakin will have to use all of his persuasive powers to get her for us."
25
And Illya is about to engage those persuasive powers right now. The object of his persuasion? Why, Marion Raven, naturally. Illya arrives at Marion's door, where, you guessed it, there is another (or the same?) party in full swing.
26
27
"Well, can I come in or can't I?" the Blond launches right into his own brand of charm. Whatever, his technique may differ from Napoleon's, but it earns him a surprised and pleased "Illya!" from Marion. Illya scans the party from the doorway and remarks, "The perfect picture of domesticity... again. May I come in?" The last in a softened tone, far different from his abrupt opening question.
28
Marion extends her hand, Illya smiles shyly and sweetly...
29
30
... and she leads him into her apartment. Hmm, what is in that box under the dear boy's arm? She leads him to the sofa and plunks him down on it.
31
32
"After all this time, what am I going to say to you?" she asks, a bit petulantly. "Uhhh..." replies Illya. "Try hello."
33
Marion smiles, relents, says hello, and sits beside him. "I brought you a present," Illya brightly remarks, and unties the ribbon on the package then whips off the lid.
34
35
Marion gasps with pleasure as Illya hands her a life preserver. "The Biella! But it's burnt, what happened to it?" she wants to know.
36
37
38
Illya takes the preserver back from her and replaces it in the box as he explains. "Gervaise Ravel, who masterminded an attempt to conquer half of Europe, and Harold Bufferton who financed it, they disappeared in the yacht Biella. We searched, we found wreckage in the Caribbean. This is part of it."
39
40
"So they're dead," Marion surmises, happily. "I've had nightmares about those two for a long time. Every night I was frightened they'd pop up out of the darkness." "There's been a guard on you ever since," Illya assures her.
41
42
One of Marion's guests snags her off the couch to dance with him, but Illya's not finished with his persuasion yet. In fact, he's hardly begun. So he follows and breaks in on the dance.
43
"It's hard to believe they're dead," Marion confesses. Illya has a confession of his own: "They're not. They faked the shipwreck for us.
44
"They're very much alive again, and waiting to start again if we give up.
45
"Only we have no intention of giving up." "Then why do you -?" Marion begins, then she starts to put two and two together. "Now wait a minute!
46
47
"You can't be trying to get me involved with them again!" "Oh, no, not really," Illya qualifies. "We just had a... a passing thought."
48
"Well, let that thought pass, buster! You just let it pass!
49
50
"If you think, if you really think, that after all the things I had to - that I - I nearly got killed!" "They were exciting days," Illya responds, as though in agreement with the angry blonde.
51
52
"Exciting?! Well, I'll be -!" "Yes, yes, I rather thought you would be," Illya confesses, clearly uncomfortable with Marion's outburst.
53
"What did you expect me to do?" she asks. "I mean, I've put all that sort of thing behind me. I've got new friends, a new job...
54
55
"I've forgotten all about those two people!" "I thought you said you hadn't" Illya reminds Marion. "Nightmares, you said."
56
57
"Don't you remind me of what I said!" she snaps, as Illya invites himself to participate in a party-goer's chess match, and gets his hand slapped for his trouble.
58
59
Marion relents a bit, and explains more calmly, "Aw, Illya, look. Surely you understand that your kind of work needs a special sort of operative. Someone who knows how to -"
60
"No, not really, not in this case," Illya interrupts. "You see, we need someone now who's not quite so efficient."
61
"Oh?" "Yes, you see, we want her to get caught. Bait, sort of." That sends Marion ballistic, as she hyperventilates herself through her response. "You! Woo!
62
"You actually expect to dangle me in front of their noses, hoping they'll snap me up?!" Illya appears not unduly concerned about Marion's fit of pique just now, as his interest has been drawn by a writer, stalled out on his typewriter. Illya, reading over his shoulder, provides unintentional inspiration as he continues his persuasive explanation.
63
64
"Oh, no, no! Not bait for them, for us! It's rather complicated really. The idea is that they capture you and then they dangle you in front of our noses.
65
66
"It's a pretty scheme, with overtones that I can only describe as Machiavellian." This grabs the writer's attention, as he decides to incorporate some sort of Machiavellian mischief into his own plot.
67
68
Illya returns his attention to Marion. "Solo dreamed it up. You remember Napoleon Solo."
69
Marion sweeps up to Illya, gritting out, "Do I remember Napoleon Solo?!"
70
She grabs his wrist and firmly escorts him toward the door, mangling the press of his jacket as she mangles his name (and am I ever surprised they let this flub pass) "Mr. Kur-y-akin...
71
"Out! Out! Out!"
72
73
Illya exits, but whirls about just outside the door. Best Barrett lip in place, he flings his final persuasive dart. "I told them you wouldn't go for it. I told them!"
74
"Oh, you did, did you? And how did you know I wouldn't go for it?"
75
"I was right, wasn't I?" "That's quite immaterial."
76
"As you said, you need a special kind of talent to fight a woman like Gervaise Ravel. Without it, it wouldn't be a fair match."
77
"Why are men so impressed to learn that a cat has claws?" "She's a very impressive woman." Marion squares her shoulders and declares, "In two words... balderdash!" Well, let's hope the talents Marion will need don't include either English or counting.
78
In any event, one of Illya's talents does appear to be persuasion, even if his methods are a bit unorthodox, for Marion soon finds herself at U.N.C.L.E. HQ with Illya and Napoleon, as they brief her for her part in this affair.
79
80
"It's just a, uh, small town resort hotel high in the Andes, very elaborate, and quite possibly, dangerous, also. Now, most of the local people are Indians, and there's one thing we can be sure of: That most of them are working for Bufferton. He's enormously wealthy, one of the richest men in the world."
81
82
83
Napoleon continues, "I want you to go into this thing with your eyes open. I don't want to pressure you into anything you may be sorry for." Marion shoots a piercing look at Illya...
84
... He looks back, unperturbed and unabashed at his 'persuasive' methods, and Marion flashes him a not-so-friendly grin.
85
"Your safety is our first and constant concern, you can be sure of that.
86
"Of course, it's a very delicate and extremely tricky situation.
87
88
89
"And, one more thing," adds Napoleon. "I want you to submit to a minor, a very minor surgical operation."
90
"What sort of an operation?" asks Marion. "I don't want to tell you that," Napoleon responds. (Well, so much for going into this with her eyes open. Unless, of course, the operation is one which will prevent her from blinking.) "All I can tell you is that it is minor, and it will not leave a lasting scar. (Well, that's a comfort, anyway.) "And it will add enormously to the safety precautions that we must take for you."
91
"You'll just have to trust us as we trust you," Illya interjects. "All right, anything you say," sighs Marion.
92
93
"Good," says Napoleon, with a grin. "Now, we'll take you over to the doctor, and he can start carving you up." "Oh, I do like a man with a sense of humor."
94
95
"Good," Napoleon repeats. "We'll leave the day after tomorrow for Baridqua. They're going to start the preparations for the local fiesta. Illya will go ahead tonight and lay some of the ground work for us."
96
97
"We will see you there, won't we?" Marion snippily asks Illya. "Well, I, uh... I'll see you there," he replies mysteriously.
98
99
When the door slides closed behind them, Illya raises an eyebrow and grins.
100
100a
The next day, Napoleon and Marion arrive at the resort hotel in Baridqua, as per plan. As Napoleon pays the taxi driver, Marion looks about the town.
100b
The town is indeed in the midst of fiesta. She sees an oddly dressed man running about, attempting to frighten the children.
101
102
Napoleon tips some local children who attempt to take their bags from the bellhop. Guess Napoleon was rewarding their initiative. :-)
103
104
Then he and Marion head into the hotel. They are stopped momentarily, however, by a street photographer, who hands Napoleon a card. Napoleon thanks him, "Gracias." Then they are finally allowed to proceed to their rooms.
105
106
But, not unobserved...
107
108
The oddly dressed man scampers up the steps, shoving past the photographer, though offering a polite, "Dispensame!" The photographer takes it in stride, merely cautioning him, "Cuidado!"
109
110
Then the strange fellow continues up the steps, though he takes a detour near the top, leaping over a wall...
111
112
... and ending up at a drain pipe...
113
... up which he begins to climb like a monkey. Are Napoleon and Marion about to have an unexpected visitor?
114
115
Marion is getting settled into her room, and Napoleon opens the inner doors onto the balcony to let in some fresh air.
116
But, suddenly, Marion sees a somewhat familiar but disturbing form, pulling open the outer doors and springing down from the balcony railing...
117
... and right into her room! Marion screams and rushes to Napoleon for protection. Oh, my! Is this affair about to turn ugly, almost from the start?