ephinatic revelations
This spring break has been... quite interesting. Lots of ups and downs. I swear, a soap opera could be made just out of this spring break... >_<
I learned...
(1) There IS such a thing as telling too much of the truth, especially too soon.
(2) True strength is the power to stop doing things that are bad for you and other people, and is not a matter of how well you can assult other people and drive yourself crazy.
(3) Getting too emotional and making too much of a scene = BAD.
(4) You gotta sometimes step back and see the big picture from a logical, unbiased standpoint, no matter how hard it is to do.
(5) It's okay to take isolated time outs when emotions aren't... cooperating.
(6) Do things rather than worry about things.
(7) The more feelings and people involved in a situation, the harder it is for you to see what you really want and need.
(8) We all mess up. The world isn't going to end because of that (well... at least with most problems). Forgive those who fucked up (especially if they feel bad about it), but most of all, forgive yourself. Then, move on.
(9) Nothing lasts forever, so don't act like it will last eternity. "Everything in life is only for now."
(10) Someone is having the same kind of problem as you, and that person might be closer than you think.
(11) You can't help the way you feel, but you can help the way you handle that feeling.
(12) The first step to putting yourself back together is actually STARTING THE PROCESS.
So yeah... I've been cleaning out my room lately... it's making reevaluate: "Do I really need this shit?" I'm throwing out more stuff than ever. I can actually feel the energy of my room improve. I thought feng shui was bullshit for the longest time... but I guess I was wrong, haha. I've started to learn how to meditate... it's helped wonders. I'm not that good at it yet since my concentration is shit, but it really organizes me. I'm getting into reading again... I never realized how much I missed it. I guess it was all that stupid reading we had to do for school that made me think, "Bah, these books suck. Is there really anything that much better?"
For a while I was considering going through a wide open door. A door which I'd be getting away from my past, and getting away from further trouble, even if things weren't "fully settled." Those people wouldn't matter to me anymore, and I would meet people that would be worth mattering over. However, I've found a hidden door while searching for answers, searching for happiness. I've unlocked a part of me I never knew was there, and I'm damn glad and thankful I found it. I did know where the open door was headed, but this door... though I don't know where it leads, I have much more faith in where it will take me than the door with the more obvious path. Why? Because I was meant to end up there. The first door was the easy way out, the fire escape, the last-resort-if-all-else-fails. I had the choice to leave with ease, but I chose to search for the way that I knew was there, even if I didn't see it first. I chose to learn from this, I chose to come out stronger. I had regrets, but now I don't.
I learned...
(1) There IS such a thing as telling too much of the truth, especially too soon.
(2) True strength is the power to stop doing things that are bad for you and other people, and is not a matter of how well you can assult other people and drive yourself crazy.
(3) Getting too emotional and making too much of a scene = BAD.
(4) You gotta sometimes step back and see the big picture from a logical, unbiased standpoint, no matter how hard it is to do.
(5) It's okay to take isolated time outs when emotions aren't... cooperating.
(6) Do things rather than worry about things.
(7) The more feelings and people involved in a situation, the harder it is for you to see what you really want and need.
(8) We all mess up. The world isn't going to end because of that (well... at least with most problems). Forgive those who fucked up (especially if they feel bad about it), but most of all, forgive yourself. Then, move on.
(9) Nothing lasts forever, so don't act like it will last eternity. "Everything in life is only for now."
(10) Someone is having the same kind of problem as you, and that person might be closer than you think.
(11) You can't help the way you feel, but you can help the way you handle that feeling.
(12) The first step to putting yourself back together is actually STARTING THE PROCESS.
So yeah... I've been cleaning out my room lately... it's making reevaluate: "Do I really need this shit?" I'm throwing out more stuff than ever. I can actually feel the energy of my room improve. I thought feng shui was bullshit for the longest time... but I guess I was wrong, haha. I've started to learn how to meditate... it's helped wonders. I'm not that good at it yet since my concentration is shit, but it really organizes me. I'm getting into reading again... I never realized how much I missed it. I guess it was all that stupid reading we had to do for school that made me think, "Bah, these books suck. Is there really anything that much better?"
For a while I was considering going through a wide open door. A door which I'd be getting away from my past, and getting away from further trouble, even if things weren't "fully settled." Those people wouldn't matter to me anymore, and I would meet people that would be worth mattering over. However, I've found a hidden door while searching for answers, searching for happiness. I've unlocked a part of me I never knew was there, and I'm damn glad and thankful I found it. I did know where the open door was headed, but this door... though I don't know where it leads, I have much more faith in where it will take me than the door with the more obvious path. Why? Because I was meant to end up there. The first door was the easy way out, the fire escape, the last-resort-if-all-else-fails. I had the choice to leave with ease, but I chose to search for the way that I knew was there, even if I didn't see it first. I chose to learn from this, I chose to come out stronger. I had regrets, but now I don't.