nye 2005 in a nutshell
currently still in columbia... but a lot has happened.
i survived my first spousal abuse (don't worry he's history). he claimed that i was the drunk one, when i was the most sober out of the bunch. plus he was drunk enough to where he has a completely different version of what happened new year's eve. he pushed me off broken_prince's front porch and a i did a back flip across the porch steps.
minute by minute of this goes through my mind constantly, and i still am confused. i tried ever so hard not to give up on this one ocassion and i end up getting hurt, literally. it's like every single moment of the day that's all i seem to think about; how things could've been done differently. but i've had friends in this kind of situation as well as my oldest sister; so it's definitely not something i want to pursue. i've seen my sister kicked in the stomach, in the face, slapped around the yard. i've seen stuff thrown at my mother from my father. i mean the list just goes on and on; yet i still do not understand why someone would do something like this to another human being.
i miss him... yes i know i'll have mbk_v2, dj_vitae, kantrip, & corpratgoon (to name a few) after my ass for saying that statement but its definitely not easy letting go of something that you wanted to see through and even more so, cared about. i'm sitting here stifling back tears from the experience as i type, mainly because a part of my life is now over.
everyone tried to console me afterwards at dj_vitae & starnostar138's house. I will admit it was a kick ass time and definitely cheered me up from the earlier events of the evening! so thank you both and the rest that were there and showed me their support!! I love you much. I just wish things wouldn't have occured the way they did. but oh well... nothing i have found yet is perfect.
New Year's night broken_prince and myself tried to hit Symmetry over at Art Bar but he couldn't get in due to the cheap material SC used to make his license... we did still donate though!! Afterwards we headed up to Charlotte to hang with passionskyle and that was a whole 'nother experience in itself, which i will admit I fell in love with his apartment! We hung out with some other misc. friends not known to LJ as well.
Got back to Columbia this morning and its been kind of boring, cept for my fits of depression here and there; but those should be gone by the weekend (i hope otherwise i'm screwed (and not in the good way)).
Until next time...
i survived my first spousal abuse (don't worry he's history). he claimed that i was the drunk one, when i was the most sober out of the bunch. plus he was drunk enough to where he has a completely different version of what happened new year's eve. he pushed me off broken_prince's front porch and a i did a back flip across the porch steps.
minute by minute of this goes through my mind constantly, and i still am confused. i tried ever so hard not to give up on this one ocassion and i end up getting hurt, literally. it's like every single moment of the day that's all i seem to think about; how things could've been done differently. but i've had friends in this kind of situation as well as my oldest sister; so it's definitely not something i want to pursue. i've seen my sister kicked in the stomach, in the face, slapped around the yard. i've seen stuff thrown at my mother from my father. i mean the list just goes on and on; yet i still do not understand why someone would do something like this to another human being.
i miss him... yes i know i'll have mbk_v2, dj_vitae, kantrip, & corpratgoon (to name a few) after my ass for saying that statement but its definitely not easy letting go of something that you wanted to see through and even more so, cared about. i'm sitting here stifling back tears from the experience as i type, mainly because a part of my life is now over.
everyone tried to console me afterwards at dj_vitae & starnostar138's house. I will admit it was a kick ass time and definitely cheered me up from the earlier events of the evening! so thank you both and the rest that were there and showed me their support!! I love you much. I just wish things wouldn't have occured the way they did. but oh well... nothing i have found yet is perfect.
New Year's night broken_prince and myself tried to hit Symmetry over at Art Bar but he couldn't get in due to the cheap material SC used to make his license... we did still donate though!! Afterwards we headed up to Charlotte to hang with passionskyle and that was a whole 'nother experience in itself, which i will admit I fell in love with his apartment! We hung out with some other misc. friends not known to LJ as well.
Got back to Columbia this morning and its been kind of boring, cept for my fits of depression here and there; but those should be gone by the weekend (i hope otherwise i'm screwed (and not in the good way)).
Until next time...