Hell has frozen over and pigs are flying

[illuded]

I, myself, and everyone else I know was probably positive that these words would never come out of my mouth, but they are about too. You may want to sit down for this, it will come as a shock as mosterous as something very monster like.

I AM NEVER DRINKING AGAIN.

Now let this sink in for a moment before making any rash descions, I may have had some really good times whilst drunk, however this past week I got alcohol poisoning, or something of the like, and for the last 5 days, I've had the worst sickness that has ever came across me. I'm startin' to feel better though. Anywho, I don't want to hear anyones bitching, I ain't changing my mind. I don't ever want to feel like that again. So, with that, I will leave my last drunken conversation.

This was an amusing one from one night Alex and I where playing War Craft 3, and oddly enough, both of us where smashed. I kept alt tabbing to talk to alley, thus all the weird WC3 quotes.

My Life Is Toxic: I got drunke arlier.
Etaanaru Aijou: im on my uhh...0935th shot of 151.
Etaanaru Aijou: choppin' day treeees...choppin' da treeees...
My Life Is Toxic: What are you doing?
Etaanaru Aijou: Choppin'...day...trees...o_o
Etaanaru Aijou: fuck
Etaanaru Aijou: da
My Life Is Toxic: You're weird.
Etaanaru Aijou: minnin' da gold..minnin' da gold..
My Life Is Toxic: Mm. I looked at your pictures.
My Life Is Toxic: I have to go die now. :(
Etaanaru Aijou: why? :(
Etaanaru Aijou: am i that ugly? :(
My Life Is Toxic: No.
Etaanaru Aijou: damnit
Etaanaru Aijou: afk suicide
My Life Is Toxic: NO.
Etaanaru Aijou: wait, what was i saying again?
Etaanaru Aijou: godamn im drunk..,.
Etaanaru Aijou: I MUST SEND A LEGION OF KODO BEASTS TO DEFEAT THE ZOMBIE KING!
Etaanaru Aijou: LESS THE STREETS BE FILLED WITH BLOOD AND BODIES
My Life Is Toxic: Fine.
Etaanaru Aijou: a great battle ensues as we speak alley!
My Life Is Toxic: Then go fight it!
Etaanaru Aijou: THE ATTACK FAILED ALLEY! RETREATTTTTT!
My Life Is Toxic: Runnnnnnn!
Etaanaru Aijou: TEH LEGIONS OF HELL ARE UPON US! WE ONLY HAVE ONE HOPE!
My Life Is Toxic: What's that?
My Life Is Toxic: It rains?
Etaanaru Aijou: i don't remember, actually..
Etaanaru Aijou: goddamn im fucked up..
My Life Is Toxic: Dork
Etaanaru Aijou: my phone goes beep..
My Life Is Toxic: WHy?
Etaanaru Aijou: I'm not sure...i dont speak phone, alley duh
My Life Is Toxic: Evil beeps?
Etaanaru Aijou: it must be trying to call forth more evil zombies..
Etaanaru Aijou: MY PHONE IS TRYING TO RAISE AN UNDEAD ARMY!
My Life Is Toxic: It's trying to tell you I called you.
Etaanaru Aijou: ...Oh..soo..noundead armies..?
My Life Is Toxic: None.
Etaanaru Aijou: good, i have scared them off then.
My Life Is Toxic: You're insane.
Etaanaru Aijou: what are you talking about?!
Etaanaru Aijou: the time of war is upon us alley!
Etaanaru Aijou: ghouls roam the streets frealy now, they must be stopped!
My Life Is Toxic: Sure.
My Life Is Toxic: You're not the slayer.
Etaanaru Aijou: SOMEONE MUST STAND UP TO THEM ALLEY!
My Life Is Toxic: No.
My Life Is Toxic: Come over and we'll cuddle.
Etaanaru Aijou: cuddle? we have no time fo jibba jabba!
Etaanaru Aijou: i believe that a man named "alex" is the head of this undead force...he is a very evil man and also, like myself, completly not sober
My Life Is Toxic: You're fucked.
My Life Is Toxic: Man.
My Life Is Toxic: Fucked.
Etaanaru Aijou: i am fucked because ia m trying to fight then undead armies by my lonesome?!~
Etaanaru Aijou: no ma'am, you are fucked.
Etaanaru Aijou: hi mr troll,l don't mind me, i'm just choppin' da trees.
Etaanaru Aijou: oh you son of a bitch
My Life Is Toxic: Don't call my mom a bitch!
Etaanaru Aijou: i was talking to the troll, miss alley
Etaanaru Aijou: he fuckin'...truied to do me or attack me or something im not sure which
My Life Is Toxic: Give me a cigarette.
Etaanaru Aijou: my house is zombie proof, so you don't have to worry.
My Life Is Toxic: ....? What does that have to do with anything?