hip hop made me do it
God I'm hating life right now. My government funding won't come through and the paperwork is never fucking ending. The twats on the phone are never efficient enough to tell me what I really need to do to be approved, so I keep stumbling around blindly trying to please these fuckers. My dumbass boyfriend is getting on my nerves. He got a new job today, and got me only the slightest bit high then took off to work leaving me fucking sleep deprived and coming down. My teeth hurt. I can't call his best friend for drugs because I have no phone credit. I have to wait till january to start school. My eating disorder is coming along swimmingly though, no actually its really not. I've gained a kilo since yesterday. How is this? I never eat! I want to go swimming. Or do something normal. I haven't left the house in four days. I've forgotten how, I think. There is no full length mirror and I'm dying to see what my lower body looks like, but I can't, and its frustrating. Its freezing cold and I want to wear cute clothes because I want to impress this dumb ass little kid because his ex girlfriend was some gorgeous sophisticated slut, but I'm just a dirty skank in the streets. Thats right.
I don't give a fuck.
I want to fight with somebody now, I want reasons to be angry. If I'm not angry I think I might just lapse into total silence and never ever speak again. Thats how I feel. If I'm touched I'll break. If I'm spoken to I cringe.
But still, everything is pretty good, pretty ok, not too bad at all.
I wrote half a letter to charli.
das it
I don't give a fuck.
I want to fight with somebody now, I want reasons to be angry. If I'm not angry I think I might just lapse into total silence and never ever speak again. Thats how I feel. If I'm touched I'll break. If I'm spoken to I cringe.
But still, everything is pretty good, pretty ok, not too bad at all.
I wrote half a letter to charli.
das it