Effe! Major Venting!
Gosh, just when I think that life could not get any worse... guess what? It does! Seriously, everything is turning to crap. Laura said that it can only go uphill from here, but I know for sure that there are a few very important things that could go wrong... my only dilemma with that is... do I want those last couple of things to go wrong? It would definatly mean a change of lifestyle. But maybe that is exactly what I need. Maybe I should go to Idaho???? I hate making decisions... seriously. But now instead of just laura pressuring me to go, I have jilliann also. My two bestest friends EVER! I was really thinking about it in Utah last week. We were sitting at Lauras aunts... just the three of us and I was like woah.. I am really going to miss them, but I just dont really see myself in idaho. I am definatly a city girl, and idaho is so blah and like 3 hours from a city. I guess I will have to pray about it. But now I am worrying about so much crap that I cant sleep lately and I keep thinking about a certain person that I should have stopped thinking about a long time ago.
("But your taste still lingers on my lips like I just placed them upon yours
and I starve, I starve for you."...this should explain it : /)
SO, next sunday I am going to talk to the Bishop. I am SO scared. I should have gone to talk to him a long long time ago. These last few months have been one long trial, and it feels like now that I have made my decision to go back and really try to give it my all, things just keep getting worse. But laura kinda explained that to me. Not going to church for a while is one of my biggest regrets... some people just dont understand my point of veiw on this. Someone that I really, really need to understand it. Do you ever know exactly what you need to do, but you just can't? I am stuck. We will see what happens in the next few months. The only thing that I have to look forward to, Jilliann coming home.
("But your taste still lingers on my lips like I just placed them upon yours
and I starve, I starve for you."...this should explain it : /)
SO, next sunday I am going to talk to the Bishop. I am SO scared. I should have gone to talk to him a long long time ago. These last few months have been one long trial, and it feels like now that I have made my decision to go back and really try to give it my all, things just keep getting worse. But laura kinda explained that to me. Not going to church for a while is one of my biggest regrets... some people just dont understand my point of veiw on this. Someone that I really, really need to understand it. Do you ever know exactly what you need to do, but you just can't? I am stuck. We will see what happens in the next few months. The only thing that I have to look forward to, Jilliann coming home.