(no subject)
Why do I let him control my emotions like this? One minute I'm bouncing off the walls and the next I'm fighting off a river of tears. But no more! I cant go on like this any more. I have to just tell him how I feel. How I love him with every viber of my being. How I would walk to the end of the Earth and back for him. Why doesnt he already know? I wish he did, but just on his own, with out help. Whenever someone "helps" me they always make it worse. Thats why I like to do things on my own. If I do them theyre done the way I want, the right way, the way that works. This is so depressing, hiding in the shadows of friendship, I'm not quit sure if you've even seen my true form. Yes, yes you did. That night, the night I cried on you. That was my true form, did you see it? Did you relize? I don't believe you did. I love you, and I can barely see you, how fair is that? But thats the story of my life. It's never fair. But I think I've waited long enough for this, dont you? Waited long enough watching you love others. Do you know what its like? Do you have any idea how it feels to see her in your arms? It felt like you were stabbing me over and over again. But you never knew that did you? I caved in on so many other things so that I could stand tall, or as tall as I can, around you. So you couldn't see the pain I felt inside when you had your arms around her, even tho we all could tell there was nothing there, it had vanished, but it still hurt. It still does actually but you can take the pain away. Just hold my in your arms, and never let go. Kiss me, and never stop kissing me. Tell me you love me and never stop saying it.
Susan
Susan