NOISE NOISE NOISE SEIZE QUIET
So, noise control. First, lets go over a few simple facts.
There's no time restriction on a noise complaint, you can have a complaint against you at 1500, and if you're too loud it will be actioned. Which brings us to the fact there's no decibel reading. It is assessed by the attending noise control officer. The officer will be more lenient at 1500 than he would be at 0300. Assuming, of course, that you're not assholes. Act like dicks, don't treat the noise control officer with respect, and the officer is going to be less than lenient. Feel like asking the guy, in uniform, who's shown up in a marked car, for ID? His identification will generally be an abatement notice. We have noise warrants, and we'll show them to you if you're assholes about it, but you'll also get the abatement notice at the same time. Throw anything at the noise control officer, or try to assault him? That's police territory, and while they're there, we'll do the seizure at the same time. Want to ignore the officer and not answer the door? That's even easier, we just put an 'unattainable' abatement in your letter box.
Now, if you have an abatement in whatever form it's been served, you are one complaint away from the really fun stuff. First off, that notice is going to turn into a $500 to $10000 fine if we show up again. The size of the fine depends on how well behaved you are. Help us dismantle the stereo and put it in the car, and it's gonna be low. Throw bottles at us, or get arrested, etc, and it's not going to be pretty. You won't get the stereo back without paying the fine, and the fine isn't going to go away if you just say 'keep the stereo'.
Speakers mounted in the walls? Head unit mounted and unable to be removed? There's a line in that abatement '...or render inoperable...'. That's right, if all else fails, we can cut and remove cables. And just to put the icing on the cake, we can take anything that makes noise. So if we think you're going to turn the TV up now we've taken your stereo, we'll take that too. Got more than one stereo? We'll take all of them, so don't try and have this shitty little thing sitting in the lounge and say it's the one making the noise, cause we'll go hunting for more.
So, all that out of the way, let's get to a funny story.
I walk up to a premise, set of flats, all with the units above the garages. I find the place, and eventually get to talk to someone. After they try to turn all the lights off and lock the doors, while I'm watching...
"City council noise control. Are you unit 8?"
"No, we're unit 9."
"Excellent, I have a noise complaint against you."
"But we're unit 9."
"Yes, and I have a noise complaint against unit 9."
"Oh, sorry, we're unit 8."
"Excellent, I have a noise complaint against you."
"But you said unit 9."
"Oh sorry, meant unit 8."
Moral of the story - I WILL tell you to turn it down, no matter what bogus address you think to give me. And if the address on an abatement form is wrong, we can just serve another one when you point it out to us, and continue with the seizure. If you don't, and try to argue that you don't have to pay, there's a fun thing the police can do with folk who lie about stuff like that.
There's no time restriction on a noise complaint, you can have a complaint against you at 1500, and if you're too loud it will be actioned. Which brings us to the fact there's no decibel reading. It is assessed by the attending noise control officer. The officer will be more lenient at 1500 than he would be at 0300. Assuming, of course, that you're not assholes. Act like dicks, don't treat the noise control officer with respect, and the officer is going to be less than lenient. Feel like asking the guy, in uniform, who's shown up in a marked car, for ID? His identification will generally be an abatement notice. We have noise warrants, and we'll show them to you if you're assholes about it, but you'll also get the abatement notice at the same time. Throw anything at the noise control officer, or try to assault him? That's police territory, and while they're there, we'll do the seizure at the same time. Want to ignore the officer and not answer the door? That's even easier, we just put an 'unattainable' abatement in your letter box.
Now, if you have an abatement in whatever form it's been served, you are one complaint away from the really fun stuff. First off, that notice is going to turn into a $500 to $10000 fine if we show up again. The size of the fine depends on how well behaved you are. Help us dismantle the stereo and put it in the car, and it's gonna be low. Throw bottles at us, or get arrested, etc, and it's not going to be pretty. You won't get the stereo back without paying the fine, and the fine isn't going to go away if you just say 'keep the stereo'.
Speakers mounted in the walls? Head unit mounted and unable to be removed? There's a line in that abatement '...or render inoperable...'. That's right, if all else fails, we can cut and remove cables. And just to put the icing on the cake, we can take anything that makes noise. So if we think you're going to turn the TV up now we've taken your stereo, we'll take that too. Got more than one stereo? We'll take all of them, so don't try and have this shitty little thing sitting in the lounge and say it's the one making the noise, cause we'll go hunting for more.
So, all that out of the way, let's get to a funny story.
I walk up to a premise, set of flats, all with the units above the garages. I find the place, and eventually get to talk to someone. After they try to turn all the lights off and lock the doors, while I'm watching...
"City council noise control. Are you unit 8?"
"No, we're unit 9."
"Excellent, I have a noise complaint against you."
"But we're unit 9."
"Yes, and I have a noise complaint against unit 9."
"Oh, sorry, we're unit 8."
"Excellent, I have a noise complaint against you."
"But you said unit 9."
"Oh sorry, meant unit 8."
Moral of the story - I WILL tell you to turn it down, no matter what bogus address you think to give me. And if the address on an abatement form is wrong, we can just serve another one when you point it out to us, and continue with the seizure. If you don't, and try to argue that you don't have to pay, there's a fun thing the police can do with folk who lie about stuff like that.