Overwhelmed.
Federal employment has been a real trip so far. My primary responsibility right now is to read past Performance Budgets so that I can write future Performance Budgets, but I have surprisingly little time to do this, in between going to presentations, filling out paperwork, and getting lost in the building. My major accomplishment of the last few days was figuring out how to make it from the elevator to my office without getting lost. I have all of these stupid things I need to sign up for (government travel? Flexplace so I can work from home?) that people keep telling me "you really need to sign up for this soon. It's very important." And I really have no idea why. And where I would get the time to do all of this, and do actual work.
But I think those frustrations will diminish as time goes on. I'm starting to learn some things about energy markets... I still have a loooong ways to go. There are some really basic concepts that I don't quite grasp at this point. Maybe my boss is just crazy and permanently on crisis mode, but it seems like I don't have that long to figure out what I'm doing. Let's hope I'm wrong.
And I'm really thankful to work with a couple of my friends from gradschool (and Melissa is coming in February!) and everyone I meet is really nice, but I verymuch feel like a teeny tiny fish in an ocean. It's been a while since I've really felt this way. It's humbling in a way, but I also have to keep reminding myself that I'm awesome and I deserve to be there. I intend to be the kind of person that doesn't blend into a crowd of government drones in DC, and I need to keep that in mind. I always have two competing voices in the back of my head, one telling me to hide and the other telling me to swathe myself in hot pink and to be bold.
In other news, apparently my best friend from high school (Cheri) is pregnant?!?! I think this would freak me out less any other week. I feel like too much of a grown up this week. How did we get this old? I don't understand.
But I think those frustrations will diminish as time goes on. I'm starting to learn some things about energy markets... I still have a loooong ways to go. There are some really basic concepts that I don't quite grasp at this point. Maybe my boss is just crazy and permanently on crisis mode, but it seems like I don't have that long to figure out what I'm doing. Let's hope I'm wrong.
And I'm really thankful to work with a couple of my friends from gradschool (and Melissa is coming in February!) and everyone I meet is really nice, but I verymuch feel like a teeny tiny fish in an ocean. It's been a while since I've really felt this way. It's humbling in a way, but I also have to keep reminding myself that I'm awesome and I deserve to be there. I intend to be the kind of person that doesn't blend into a crowd of government drones in DC, and I need to keep that in mind. I always have two competing voices in the back of my head, one telling me to hide and the other telling me to swathe myself in hot pink and to be bold.
In other news, apparently my best friend from high school (Cheri) is pregnant?!?! I think this would freak me out less any other week. I feel like too much of a grown up this week. How did we get this old? I don't understand.