life sucks
I feel so disconnected to everything right now. I mean all i do is work and lie in bed... literally that is all i do. I have nothing to do, no where to go except home to bed. I am finding it harder and harder to find reasons why I should get up in the morning and face the world. What is the point, no one is going to be effected by the fact that i am not there... i am despenible... i fuckin hate winter, and i fuckin hate the fact that i am stuck in this place again. I hate the fact that i have no friends, my family doesn't care, i work too much, and that i have dropped God completely out of my life... i hate where i am and i hate the fact that i just don;t care.
Christmas is going to suck... Quebec City which was suppose to be a get away and a refocus on God will be shadowed by hurt, loneliness and self conciousness. Temptation is hard to freakin deal with... and i'm scared. I miss God and i want Him back in my life and i don't know where to start... i suck
Christmas is going to suck... Quebec City which was suppose to be a get away and a refocus on God will be shadowed by hurt, loneliness and self conciousness. Temptation is hard to freakin deal with... and i'm scared. I miss God and i want Him back in my life and i don't know where to start... i suck