life
it amazes me how much it can hurt sometimes. ya know. i write this hear because i know nobody reads it. i have complained about so much to people that now there is no choice but to put on a happy face. i have awesome friends that leave me as soon as they find "the one" and i am left again dealing with everyone elses problems. trying to hide my own. i feel so selfish for wanting the attention of someone. everyone that i have been close to is either gone or will be in the near future. and i am left to work it out on my own. i try my best to help them and give tehm advice and they always find and get what they want through it. but what about what i want. when will someone make sure i get that. when will someone care enough. sense i cannot fufill my own happiness i see toit that everyone around me reaches that thing for which they have been aiming. though it is my doing i cannot help but regret when it happens. i leave myself in the dust.
i was watching a show on cutting and was amazed at how rational it sounded. this girl was talking aboutwhy she cut and why it was ok and every word made sense to me. she talked about how maybe the reason she cant stop is because she doesnt want to. scars give a sense of accomplishment, with emotional pain you cant say a specific it hurts right here because of this exact thing. with cutting you can say it hurts rigt here on my arm because of this cut. it is a pain that you can control and nobody can inflict on you.
i was watching a show on cutting and was amazed at how rational it sounded. this girl was talking aboutwhy she cut and why it was ok and every word made sense to me. she talked about how maybe the reason she cant stop is because she doesnt want to. scars give a sense of accomplishment, with emotional pain you cant say a specific it hurts right here because of this exact thing. with cutting you can say it hurts rigt here on my arm because of this cut. it is a pain that you can control and nobody can inflict on you.