(no subject)
I am sorry that I have not been as social as I have used to have been lately. It is a neuroses of mine that I need to be dealing with, but I have not. To be honest, I am unsure of how to deal with this. People comment on it when I attempt to socialize again... "I remember when you were so innocent/young/you've changed". What is change, a bad.. thing, or a good thing?
I appreciate being treated of my intelligence and maturity, not of my 'age'. Maturation is different with one of MPD. I do not know how to explain this, really. I also do not want people to think I am bad for changing...
I love who I am. But will others, if I speak to them again, love who I am now as well as what I used to be?
I was told once by a man whose opinion I take no stock in that I was a 'cool thing to know', a fad, my innocence and newness made me something everyone wanted, but they would get over it. I know people are different than this. I do know this. But for someone to say that is very cruel...
I could never be as cruel back, nor would I want to be, but there is many things I could have said to that.
But it is a mark of who I wish to be that I did not, and merely stepped away from the situation and person at hand.
I just hope that if I go back to the internets in general, people can forgive me for my temporary trespasses of losing contact.
I appreciate being treated of my intelligence and maturity, not of my 'age'. Maturation is different with one of MPD. I do not know how to explain this, really. I also do not want people to think I am bad for changing...
I love who I am. But will others, if I speak to them again, love who I am now as well as what I used to be?
I was told once by a man whose opinion I take no stock in that I was a 'cool thing to know', a fad, my innocence and newness made me something everyone wanted, but they would get over it. I know people are different than this. I do know this. But for someone to say that is very cruel...
I could never be as cruel back, nor would I want to be, but there is many things I could have said to that.
But it is a mark of who I wish to be that I did not, and merely stepped away from the situation and person at hand.
I just hope that if I go back to the internets in general, people can forgive me for my temporary trespasses of losing contact.